Language Progress!

It was interesting... I spent Sunday in the Center of the Universe*, as usual... and stayed up rather late talking with Bizarro, Syd, Mr. P., Biff and Tobi. One thing I've noticed lately is that I can understand and speak German on a similar level during all hours of the day, including rather late at night.

"So, what's the point?" you might ask.

Well, earlier, I'd hit a wall towards the end of the day. This phenomena phenomenon was especially noticeable Wednesday nights during Bible Study, Friday nights with the youth, and when I was out late with friends. It was as if I'd simply run out of words and hit a language wall - I couldn't remember words I ought to know, couldn't formuluate sentences, and couldn't even understand that much anymore. Recently, this hasn't been happening.

Last night, some of the topics of conversation were a little new and difficult for me (tractor technicalities and earthquake geology, for example)... there are simply words I've never used and have no way of knowing. And even though it was 11 at night, I could follow most everything, and even chime in here and there - whether it be a question, a comment, or a word-definition-request (unfortunately, Leo decided to stay in Neukirchen, so I had to ask Syd).

Earlier, I would have simply had to tune out.

Language Progress! Yay!

I think that if I can manage to stay here, say, two or three more years, you won't be able to tell that I'm an American. I've always thought it'd be interesting to be able to fit so well into a different culture that people don't know you're a foreigner. :)


*Hoerstgen

The Soapbox* (or Sport ist Mord)

*steps on the soapbox*

*scratches her head*

*steps off the soapbox*

*steps on the soapbox*

*looks around*

*steps off the soapbox*

*steps on the soapbox*

*thinks for a few minutes*

*steps off the soapbox*

*wipes the sweat from her brow*

Phew, that was enough excercise for one day.

Yes, folks, that would be me exerting mental energy in deep contemplation of complicated life issues in complicated foreign languages, while simultaneously attempting to decide whether or not to stand on the soapbox to preach about certain issues and concerns, while simultaneously simultaneously (yes, this redundancy was madly and deliberately executed) exerting physical energy, which has supposed health benefits.

Though I tend to think that "Sport ist Mord" ("Sports is Death"... but it rhymes in German and thus sounds better).


*inspired by a conversation with Eleanor and Sydney

On Pessimism

The sign of a true pessimist is being pessimistic about your own pessimism. Contrary to popular belief, being a depressed-misunderstood-drowning-in-tears-wrist-slitting-Emo who sits around philosophizing while the guitar (or piano or whatever) gently weeps isn't as glamorous as some might think.

I get annoyed when people optimistically tell me how pessimistic and dark they are, and how their favourite color is black, blah, blah, blah. If you're really a pessimist, you're not going to cheerfully and proudly broadcast it. You're going to be pessimistic about it.

Just my opinion.

*steps off the soapbox*

Autobahn (and Interview)...

On the way home from an interview today, I decided to make a video in an attempt to capture the Autobahn Experience for my dear Texas/US audience.

The interview went well... though the city is too far away... ugh, I don't know what to do. And half the time I feel less like an international professional business woman and more like a little girl playing dress-up in her mom's high-heeled shoes.

Anyway. Enjoy the video. :)

Questions. And. Weird. Punctuation.

Life. Is. Frequently. Bewildering. And. I. Have. Many. Unanswered. Questions.

Is it better to be bewildered or to be bored?

Is it better to be constantly challenged or to live in a comfortable status quo?

Do normal, sane people make drastic overseas moves at age 22?

To what extent is age relative?

Is it ok to play Christmas music year-round?

Does everyone have a breaking point?

How far can someone be pushed/challenged before they go into burn-out-mode?

If you love someone, does it necessarily mean that they love you to the same extent?

Does out-of-sight equal out-of-mind?

Why do things rarely run as planned? If this is the case, why plan at all?

If you could look into the future, would you choose to do so?

When will German grocery stores start carrying chocolate chips?

That's. All. For. Now. Think. Think. Think.

Last day of work...

My last day of work (on-site, that is... I'm still technically a BenQ employee) was last Friday... and being inspired by the obnoxious press, I decided to take some pictures of my own to share with you all. Not too many people have lived through what I've had to go through, so I thought this might be of interest.

As always, click on the photo to make it larger.


This is the view when leaving the building... and as you can see, there are several people from the press waiting outisde to take our pictures as we left. Now, put yourself in my shoes for a minute: you've been crying with your co-workers all day because everything is so sudden and brutal... and when leaving the building (with a swollen, red face, of course) for probably the last time, people from the press are outside waiting for you and taking snapshots. It was harsh, to the say the least, and I wouldn't wish what I had to go through on anyone.


The press took pictures of me and my co-workers without my permission, so I decided to take some lovely snapshots of them. This is another one taken while exiting the building. It was funny... as I was taking the pictures, cars were stopping for me and people were treating me as if I were a professional photographer of some sort. Ha.


They're seriously so blatant and unashamed about it! This guy was crouched to the left of the entrance, taking pictures. I guess my taking a picture of him was, em, slightly blatantly unashamed as well, but whatev. It was my last day and I was ticked off.


Here's the entrance to the building...


Someone taped a piece of paper that says "Siemens" over the BenQ sign at the entrance. Yet another way of demonstration...


This says "Don't close BenQ" It sounds better in German, though, cause it rhymes.


This says, "If you throw the people out, the lights in Kamp-Lintfort will go out." Again, it sounds better in German. Or maybe I stink at translating.


Here you can see the tent that IG Metall, the Labour Union which is responsible for us, set up. Their red flags and symbols are all over the site.


It's hard for me to describe the last several weeks... very harsh, brutal, overwhelming and nasty. But I've learned a ton, am having to seriously trust God, and am being forced to re-evaluate what it is I want to do and where I want to be.

Last year when moving here, I wanted a challenge. If ever I've had one, this is it.

Bewerbungsfoto

In Germany, when you apply for a job, you need a "Bewerbungsfoto" or an "application picture." Here's mine:


And here are some possible captions:


"Mary for President" (Thanks, Sarah!)

"Mary for Bundeskanzlerin" (inspired by Sarah)

"Constantine's Dream" (Thanks, Shelby... how embarrassing!!!)

"That's FRAU Barber to you"

"Professionalism at its Best"

"Insolvency Inschmolvency"

"The Barber Identity"

"Keep Exploring!"

"The Approaching Train Wreck"

"Taiwan gone Bad"

"Corporate Image!"

"Europe's Next Top Model"

"Das Leben ist... wait, cancel that thought."


I'm accepting more caption suggestions, in case you have any.

Youth Group Video!

If a picture's worth a thousand words, then what's a video worth? :)

This is so typical of what goes on with the youth at church. They're out of control and hilarious... and thanks to YouTube, my dear US Readers can have a glimpse of the insanity.



Ok, here's a recap of who everyone in the video is (see the List of Characters, as usual)...

Eleanor is the lady in the green shirt and orange jacket (she always wears orange or green).

Syd is in the red shirt to the left, observing as opposed to participating in such silliness.

The two girls on the couch on the right are Lizzy (brown jacket) and Annita (Syd's sis, in the yellow shirt).

The Little Rascal is the one in the green shirt and jumping around like a crazed monkey.

Mariposa is in the red jacket, trying to straighten up.

Yup yup. That's our little group.

Das Leben ist...

Though life can be brutally cruel, I've concluded that it's not a Jammertal.*

For every dose of Bitterness, there usually seems to be an equal, if not greater, dose of Sweetness. Or Goodness. Or Encouragement. Or Music. Or Beauty.

*Valley of Misery

Sozialized Healthcare saved my life (well, my sore throat)

I've finally found a system/organization in Germany that's not overly complicated, frustrating and downright aggravating on a very personal level: the Healthcare System!

Let's take a moment to applaud Sozialized Healthcare. *clap clap clap*

I went to the doctor for the first time since living here (that's right, folks, one year and one month without a doctor, MUAH!) and was dreading it. But it worked. All I did was pay my 10 Euro co-pay and let them scan my little insurance-credit-card-thing, and they let me in.

What I found odd was that they didn't give me a medical background questionnaire to fill out.

[Aside to my German friends: when you go to a new doctor in the States, you always have to fill out an extremely long and detailed questionnaire about your medical history. No, this information isn't passed on from one doctor to another.]

Today, all they did was ask for my address and phone number. Strangeness.

The doctor asked a few health questions, looked at my throat, then gave me some anti-biotics. It was that simple. And "free." And I didn't even have to strip and put on an uncomfortably awkward night gown.

No wonder so many co-workers go to the doctor and take off of work every chance they get. Hmm... it's actually not a bad idea...

Photo Recap of the Last Several Months...

Sunday was a lovely day... after church, Bizarro Mom and Mr. P. were nice enough to let me travel to the Center of the Universe* with them and spend the afternoon there doing nothing. Well, we read and took an afternoon nap. Then I played the piano and looked through photos while Bizarro sorted them into notebooks.

Looking at the photos reminded me that I haven't posted any here in a while... so... here are some older photos (I've been so bad about taking photos lately... need to start taking more again!) which have finally been uploaded.

To make a photo larger, simply click on it.

Enjoy. :)

Here I am with Lizzy. :)


Here are some of the crazy youth from church... they're fabulous! :)


This was taken at the Lake one lazy Sunday afternoon. As you can see, the trailor was parked on the edge of the of the overhang, providing a perfect platform from which one can hurl oneself into the water.


Here's Syd playing the piano (yay for overstating the obvious) at the Music Seminar in Wiedenest.


If you ever need an army of Lego Men, Köln is the place to go. This was taken at a Lego shop in Köln. I was disappointed, though, because there were some repeats. Cheaters.


And another Köln picture... as usual, Mr. P. and Syd are analyzing (or shall I say overcomplicating?) something.


Here I am with Biff on one of his strange tractor-like-lawn-mower-like contraptions.


A group of us from choir sang during the Easter and Baptism service back in the Spring. (Yes, I'm wayyy behind in my photo uploading and posting.) Eleanor and I tried to sing alto... but it ended up being a weird mixture (at least in my case) of alto and soprano.


This is our gymnasium-turned-auditorium, used for special/larger events. Similar to how we used to do it at Hill Country Bible Church.


That's all for now...


*Hörstgen

The Senile Woman and the Murderous Children

Today was interesting, to say the least. I took the day off to take care of some things and run som errands. La la la.

While outside the grocery store, this little old lady started talking to me. And she wouldn't stop. I seriously think she's senile and paranoid.

Lady: "Watch out for the children! They'll push you off your bike and beat you with sticks."
Mary: "Excuse me?"
Lady: "I was riding my bike through town, and the children came and beat me up. Look!" *shows me a nonexistent bruise on her face*
Mary: "Em..."
Lady: "I went to the police, but they won't do anything about it. The children are horrible. They're going to kill me."
Mary: "How do you know? Are you certain?"
Lady: "No one believes me! I tell everyone, and no one believes me. And they stole my bicycle, right out of the basement."
Mary: "That's terrible..."
Lady: "Then I was riding my bike over a bridge in Moers, and the children tried to push me off the bridge."
Mary: "I'm sorry..."
Lady: "They wanted to kill me."
Mary: "Is it possible that you've aggravated the children?"
Lady: "No! I just tell them not to scream and play in the street and they try to kill me. Be careful of them."

Ok. Sometimes when I write, I slightly fabricate the conversations. But everything I've written here - whether the lady said it or I said it - is true. I shortened and condensed what was said (she talked for about a half an hour...), but that's all.

I didn't know what to do or say.

And now I'm terrified that evil little children are going to sneak into my appartment and kill me in my sleep.

On Sex and Context

When people have sex in the wrong context, it makes them stupid. Incredibly stupid.

By "stupid", I mean lacking in judgement, inability to see see and think clearly, inability to see the other person and situation as it really is, placement of your own desires above all else, apathy and disregard for consequences, and a shirking of responsibility.

By "context", I mean marriage. Yes, I'm taking the unpopular, seemingly-prude, seemingly-old-fashioned stance. But I'm doing so strongly and unapologetically. So shoot me.

Sex is a binding, sacred and beautiful force, created to be shared exclusively between a man and a woman in the right context. But taken outside this context, it is dangerous and destructive.

Like anything taken in excess or abused in the wrong context, it will take a powerful hold on your life. And it will kill you. The word "kill" is neither exaggeration nor dramatization.

I've seen a lot. A lot of horribly stupid things that simultaneously break my heart and make me want to strangle people.

Let this be a warning.

*steps off the soapbox*

Thanks, Bizarro Mom!!!

Thanks to Bizarro Mom, I'm going to take lessons in piano improvisation and maybe even the organ!!! I have to stay here. Absolutely have to stay here.

Anders gehts nicht.

*sniff sniff*

Work Update, 11.10.06

The drama is never ending. At work, we either have a ton to do in the sense that we have to calculate and turn in a number/report within a couple of hours, or we're bored. Today's more of a bored-day, so here are some articles from the past week I found to give you an idea of what's going on. I translated the titles into English, but the articles themselves are from German sources.

It can be a cruel, bitter world.

DISCLAIMER: Nothing written here is confidential; all information can be found in various public news sources.

1000 BenQ employees to lose their jobs (Source)

BenQ Confirms drastic personnel reduction (Source)

IG-Metall* calls Siemens to disclose BenQ contracts (Source)

Many BenQ patents are gone (Source)

Insolvency Administrator** brings hope for BenQ employees (Source)

Politics and economics put pressure on BenQ (Source)

BenQ insolvency: Klaus Kleinfeld's*** failure (Source)

As you can tell, there's a ton of drama, complexity and chaos on a myriad of levels between multiple high-powered-players. Players include Taiwan, Germany, BenQ Corp, BenQ Mobile, Siemens, CEOs on both sides, K.Y.Lee, Clemens Joos, Klaus Kleinfeld, Politics, the Bundeskanzlerin, the NR-W Ministerpräsident, the NR-W Wirtschaftsministerin, Economics, Siemens employees throughout Germany, the Betriebsrat, Insolvency Administrators... and that's all I can think of at the moment.

It's neither fun nor pretty.


* a Labour Union fighting for employee's rights and jobs

** Insolvenzverwalter, the new legal CEO

*** the current Siemens CEO

The Resume Post: Education

As most everyone knows, I've been working on my Resume in case something with my current job falls through. It's a long, rough process... and I'd appreciate any feedback. Here's the "Education" section. Let me know what you think.

Education

Texas A&M University, College Station, Texas, USA, 08/01- 12/04
- Major in International Studies with Minors in German and Psychology
- graduated with a “Distinguished Student Certificate” for academic excellence
- worked together with a cruel advisor from the pits of Hades
- organized and coordinated a hitman to deal with aforementioned advisor
- Member of the International Student Organization

Round Rock High School (public school), Round Rock, Texas, USA, graduated 05/01
- Member of Quill and Scroll, a nationally recognized Journalism Society
- Member of the Spanish Club
- Member of the “Students Happy to Get the *bleep* Out of Private School” Club
- received the “University Interscholastic League Scholar Award” for academic excellence
- Participant in car-egging activities and the promotion of banned books
- Features Editor of the School Newspaper


Thanks in advance for your help.

Coming up next... Professional Experience!

Tunnels and Lights

There's definitely a light at the end of the Tunnel. Though I'm afraid I'm still too far away to determine whether it's an opening into a new, bright, sunshiny day or the headlights of an oncoming train about to run me over.

We'll see in a few months. Or weeks. Or days.

*shrugs her shoulders and continues venturing towards the light*

A Short Submarine and Music Story

Once upon a time, there was a yellow submarine that sailed beneath the waves in a sea of green. The crew was a very peaceful, content and musical crew. They loved their little yellow submarine, their music, their daily chocolate rations and their time together.

As a matter of fact, there was even a band on board, and this internationally renowned band played in harbours all over the world. The submarine, the music, and the chocolate had to be financed in some way, after all.

There was a slight problem with some of the instruments, however. A few were slightly out of tune or not up-to-date, and the band also had a Keyboard as opposed to a real piano, which was a huge disadvantage.* The submarine Captain, Sergeant Pepper, recognized the problem, but being the cruel, powerful, greedy creep he was, started secretly looking around for a new Sergeant.

Without consulting the crew or the band, Sgt. Pepper simply sold them one day and joined a red submarine that sailed the sea of blue. The new Captain, Sgt. Dai Zui Fan Xiang (English name: Bobby) came from a Land Far Away and promised that he'd help the musicians tune their instruments and maybe even invest in a real classical grand piano one day. Everyone was a little uncertain, but they didn't have any other choice, so they sailed away in the sea of green with Sgt. Bobby.

The seas they sailed were rough and the waves were wild. There was so much turbulence, in fact, that the submarine almost sank multiple times. Many crew members were sick; the instruments were broken; and the band slowly began to lose their motivation and strength. After a year, Sgt. Bobby, being equally as cruel and greedy as Sgt. Pepper, decided he'd had enough, so he packed up as many instruments as he could carry and flew back to his Land Far Away, where no one could find him.

By this point, the crew was livid. They'd been lied to and tricked, and decided to investigate. What they found was not pretty. Not only did Sgt. Pepper sell them, but he had given Sgt. Bobby 350 thousand mp3 music files and a brand new mp3 player as payment. Sgt. Pepper had also signed a contract stating that many of the instruments and the music that the band had written belong to Sgt. Bobby and not to the band itself. In addition, the band's music-know-how had been stolen: Sgt. Bobby had seen their sheet music, their lyrics, their technical equipment, and their new song ideas.

The crew went into panic, cancelled their upcoming band gigs, and hired a Private Music Guru to advise them what to do next. The Private Music Guru saw the following options: (1) find a new Sergeant for the yellow submarine, (2) find multiple submarine Sergeants who might be interested in buying certain parts of the submarine, (3) carry on as before, but with an unmotivated crew and broken instruments, or (4) let the submarine sink.

In the meantime, the crew will not only give up their music writing and practicing, but they might have to give up their daily chocolate rations for three months as well. Instead of practicing, singing, playing and scrubbing the decks, they're all sitting around sulking, smoking cigarettes, drinking coffee and trying to figure out what to do next.

story to be continued...


*HINT HINT


Story inspired by Yellow Submarine by the Beatles and life's situations

Work Update, 04.10.06

The work atmosphere is horribly depressing. And. I'm. having. a. hard. time. dealing. with. it.

I don't usually get angry, but the current situation really puts me off. So, as usual, I'm coping by turning it into either poetry or a joke.

Anyway. I decided to call Uncle Dubyah today as a last resort.

*ring ring*
Secretary: "Thank you for calling the White House, how may I direct your call?"
Mary: "Hey, it's Mary. Is Uncle Dubyah there?"
Secretary: "Of course, just a second."
*click click click*
President Bush: "Buddy the Elf, what's your favourite colour?"
Mary: "We have a serious situation here!"
Bush: "What's going on, kiddo?"
Mary: "I'm really ticked off at Taiwan."
Bush: "Yeah, I never liked the Middle East that much... ya know, all those crazy Latinos."
Mary: *scratches her head* "Well, I have a new mission for you."
Bush: "Does it involve explosives?"
Mary: "Would you turn Taiwan into a parking lot? Or a landing strip? Or maybe a theme park?"
Bush: "Let me check my calendar..."

And we'll be checking the international news.

Never-never Land

Last night* I somehow ended up in a deserted mansion in Never-never Land. There was this ancient ornately carved wooden piano in the hallway that I unfortunately wasn't able to play, as Wendy, John, Michael and I were being hunted down by evil beady-eyed Taiwanese Business Men**. Fortunately we escaped, thanks to a Narnia-esque Wardrobe filled with mothball-laden clothes, perfect for hiding in.

Peter Pan showed up late... but instead of being a normal-sized human being, he was a little flying green Lego Man.

Tinkerbell was nowhere to be seen.

Life gets weirder by the day (or by the night, should I say?).


*in another bizarre dream of mine

**actually, by Captain Hook and the Crew

Work Update, 02.10.06

Hmm... how do I phrase this to avoid losing my job today as opposed to in a couple of months? Let's just say that the drama and headaches are never-ending. And, fortunately, so is the love and support. So, THANK YOU!

Here are the recent interesting developments*:

- Jürgen Rüttgers, the Ministerpräsident of Nordrhein-Westfallen (comparable to a state governor), was actually at our site on Friday. That's a big deal. And I was ten feet away from him... though he's no competition for Tony Blair.

- The Works Council/Committee (Betriebsrat), IG Metall and some other local politicians also threw a well-deserved hissyfit for the workers and the press on Friday. Ah, riled-up crowds... they're interesting to observe.

- An Insolvency Administrator (Insolvenzverwalter) has taken over the company; all costs and decisions are in his control.

- My co-workers refer to me as Aphrodite. If the Taiwanese can pick out English names for themselves, then my co-workers and I can pick out Greek names, darn it. I originally wanted to be Artemis, but they thought Aphrodite was a better fit.

- Our salaries are guaranteed until December 31, and will be covered by the Employment Bureau (Arbeitsamt).

- Siemens announced Monday that they would help BenQ employees by paying for additional schooling that could be needed for a new job. Um. Thanks. But I'd prefer an actual job.

*sigh*

Two new projects have officially been considered and approved, and will be executed as soon as possible: Project Freak-Out Avoidal and Project New Opportunity Search.

Das Leben ist... em... manchmal ne bissl hart.


*everything I've written has also surfaced somehow, at some point, in the press. I'm not spilling any confidential information here.

Work Update, 29.09.06

Instead of describing myself what's going on, I'll let you, my dear Readers, read the official Press Release which was released yesterday.

But first, a couple personal thoughts/points:

1. No one (including me, my bosses, the CEO, etc.) knows exactly what this will look like practically, or how much time we have.

2. There's a lot I don't understand, but I do know that foul and unfair play has been (and is) taking place.

3. I'm not sure exactly what steps I'm going to take next.

4. I want to stay here in Neukirchen-Vluyn. Very badly.

*takes a deep breath*

First, the English Version:

"BenQ is to discontinue payments to BenQ Mobile* in Germany.
BenQ Mobile GmbH & Co OHG* faces insolvency.
The worldwide mobile business is to be continued by BenQ from Asia.

TAIPEI, TAIWAN, MUNICH, GERMANY, 28th September 2006 – BenQ announced today in Taipei that there will be no further payments to BenQ Mobile GmbH & Co OHG.. Both revenue and margin development will fall far short of expectations in the important Christmas quarter. Due to the discontinuation of further financial support from the parent company, BenQ, and the difficult business situation resulting in a lack of liquidity, BenQ Mobile in Germany will file for insolvency at the local court in Munich within the next few days. The BenQ Mobile Headquarter in Munich, as well as the sites Kamp-Lintfort and Bocholt in North-Rhine-Westphalia, with a total of approx 3000 employees, are af-fected. (1.400 in Munich and 1.600 in NRW). BenQ Mobile Management, headquartered in Munich, Germany has taken immediate action in order to secure ongoing business op-eration. Possible consequences for the other BenQ Mobile sites and regional companies still need to be evaluated. BenQ plans to continue its global mobile business under the brand of BenQ-Siemens, and continue to utilise its associated research and development facilities, as well as production facilities, in Asia."

(Source)

And now, the German Version:

"BenQ stellt Zahlungen an seine Mobiltelefonsparte in Deutschland ein
BenQ Mobile GmbH & Co OHG* steht vor Insolvenz
Weltweites Geschäft mit Handys der Marke BenQ-Siemens wird durch BenQ aus Asien heraus fortgesetzt

TAIPEI, TAIWAN, MÜNCHEN, DEUTSCHLAND, 28. September 2006 – BenQ gab heute in Taipei bekannt, dass es keine weitere Zahlungen mehr an seine Mobiltelefonsparte BenQ Mobile GmbH & Co OHG leisten wird. Umsatz- und Margenentwicklung im wichtigen Weihnachtsgeschäft wird deutlich hinter den Erwartungen liegen. Wegen der Einstellung weiterer Finanzhilfen durch den Mutterkonzern BenQ und dem daraus entstehenden Liquiditätsmangel wird BenQ Mobile in Deutschland aufgrund der schwierigen Geschäftssituation in den nächsten Tagen Insolvenz beim Amtsgericht München beantragen. Davon sind die Zentrale in München und die Standorte in Kamp-Lintfort und Bocholt in Nordrhein-Westfalen mit insgesamt etwa 3.000 Mitarbeitern (1.400 in München und 1.600 in NRW) betroffen. Das Management von BenQ Mobile wird umgehend Maßnahmen treffen, um das laufende Geschäft aufrecht zu erhalten. Mögliche Folgen für die anderen Standorte und regionalen Gesellschaften von BenQ Mobile müssen noch geklärt werden. BenQ plant sein globales Geschäft mit Handys der Marke BenQ-Siemens fortzusetzen und wird dazu seine bestehenden Forschungs- und Entwicklungs-, als auch Fertigungskapazitäten in Asien weiter nutzen."

(Source)

The two main prayer requests/ needs/ wants right now are: (1) the ability to trust God and not freak out and (2) wisdom to know what to do next.


*my company/employer. The "mother company" is BenQ; the German mobile phone division is BenQ Mobile.

My Charmingly Convivial New Neighbor

New Neighbor: *scowls* "I thought you were from Brazil."
Mary: "No, I'm from North America - from Texas."
NN: *frowns* "Isn't that where Bush's brother is governor?"
Mary: "No, Bush's brother Jeb is the governor of Florida. George W himself was the former governer of Texas."
NN: *mutters something under his breath that Mary can't understand*
Mary: "Excuse me?"
NN: *grimaces* "Most of the world is ticked off at America."
Mary: "I'd rather not discuss politics."
NN: *scowls* "Well, I don't feel sorry for the Americans."
Mary: "Like I said, I don't discuss politics because it only frustrates people."
NN: *grunts*

Seriously, who says something like that to someone they've just met? Can we say ISSUES?

We're going to get along just dandily.

The Mission: to change Germany's view of Americans, one grumpy old curmudgeon at a time. I think I'll bake him some cookies. And until he really ticks me off, I'll be a good neighbor and leave the aresenic out.

Work is FUNNY.

So... my new boss told me that if I didn't correct and straighten out a certain issue, he's going to need heart medication. If I were in his place, I'd be on the phone with the Krankenkasse* first thing tomorrow morning, snark, snark, snark.

Then, I yelled "Abwesend!" (absent) the other day when he called me from the other side of our huge, open office because I thought he was a different co-worker.

Boss: "Mary, please come here for a minute."
Mary: "ABWESEND!!!"
*the office becomes silent and everyone holds their breath, eager to witness my demise*
Boss: "Excuse me?"
Mary: "Oh, Scheisse..."

Assuming retirement takes place at 65, I have about 42 more years of working-world-bliss. YEAH, BABY! BRING IT ON!


*health insurance organization

Holy *KRACH*

Guess what happened this morning... I played a PIPE ORGAN, thanks to Bizarro Mom!!! It's hilarious - she's so curious and friendly and crazy and nosy, with her nose in everyone's business, that she has serious connections. Last week after work I somehow* ended up at their place, which is where the plot begins to unfold.

Bizarro: "So, what do you think about learning to play the organ?"
Mary: "What? Are you serious?"
Bizarro: "I know the Hörstgen church organist... you could even take lessons."
Mary: "Em..."
Bizarro: "I'll call her up."
*ring ring*

And the rest is history.

Sure enough, I went to the little village church in Hörstgen this morning and was given a brief history of the organ and was then allowed to play it. It was weird... there was only one level of keys (as opposed to the usual two or three levels), and the pedals corresponded to the lower half of the keys. It was extremely difficult for me to play because it only had approximately 25% - 33% as many keys as a piano. All the songs I play (especially the classical pieces) require practically the entire set of piano keys, so when I sat down at the organ, it felt rather crammed and constricted and confusing. But I managed to play a couple little bits of this and that.

I wanted to mess around more, but there were some older people there who were trying to drink their after-church-coffee, so I felt bad (especially after one cranky old fart shushed me). The organist and the pastor said that if I ever want to play, I should let them know and they'll give me the key to the church. CRAZINESS!

I think I might have found a new hobby/challenge/obsession.


*well, it was actually a conscious and deliberate decision.

A Visit from my Boys!

After driving to the Center of the Universe* for a freakin' awesome choir concert with Biff in Tenor, I returned home for the shock of my life. Waiting for me outside my appartment were John, Paul, George and Ringo. I kid you not. And the only alcohol I've had today was in the Tiramisu.

I invited them in, of course, and we talked into the wee hours of the morning about glass onions, newspaper taxis, the USSR, yellow submarines, paperbacks, and our mutual friend Lucy.

John kept talking philosophy and religion, but at least it was in English (if you consider British English to be English); Paul was a sweetie and played me some of my favourite songs, as he'd remembered to bring his guitar along; Ringo kept drumming his fingers on the coffee table and annoying me; and George didn't do or say much of anything.

Fun times.

Thanks, Karen!


*Hörstgen

Project Pipe Organ

Saturday was, em, interesting.* Not only did I attend my first German wedding, but I played the piano at my first wedding. It was only one song, and the choir sang along, so it wasn't that horribly nerve-wracking or ulcer-inducing.

Ok. I officially have a new project (or, possibly two new projects, if somehow acquiring a helicopter and turning the roof of my appartment into a landing dock can be considered a project): Project Pipe Organ. I've got a fever, and the only prescription is a 16th Century Pipe Organ!

During the wedding ceremony, we sang an old German church song (Großer Gott, wir loben Dich), accompanied by the organ, and it was completely mesmerizing. I'm not sure exactly what happened during that song, or how, or why... but let's just say that I think I now know what it feels like to be in a trance-like state. It was so breath-takingly powerful and holy and overwhelming and angelic and gorgeous and loud. I felt like I'd floated backwards a couple of centuries and was singing with Saint Cecilia herself. Forget quitting work to start a rock band or learn the Drehleier... the new goal is to become the lead Organist in a heavenly choir of Seraphims and Cherubims.

I've already started browsing Ebay for Pipe Organs... hopefully it'll (a.) fit in my appartment and (b.) not annoy my neighbors.


*in both the German and English sense of the word, Eleanor. :)

Blah.

*sets something important on fire*

*hurls a rock through a window*

*jumps off the balcony*

*punches a hole in the wall*

*keys the driving school car*

*crashes the computer with an infinite Excel loop*

*screams at the top of her lungs*


Man, that felt good. Even if it was only virtual.


Ok, my dear Readers, Essay Question Time: Describe, in the form of comparison and contrast, aggression, passive aggression and virtual aggression. How closely related are passive aggression and virtual aggression?

Please turn in your typed (Times New Roman, double-spaced, font-size 10.5, margins 1 inch on all sides) responses, complete with full name, date and favourite music group/singer to Fr. Barber no later than September 18, 2106.

Inevitable Cultural Integration and the Informal You

You know you're being culturally integrated when you find yourself doing things or thinking in ways that you once snickered at.

Germans frequently refer to one another as "Mr/Mrs/Ms So-and-so," especially when first meeting someone or when there's not much contact with someone. Moving from the Formal You to the Informal You can even be seen as a major step in a relationship.

The fact that this little rule has found a home in my thinking over the past year was proven today when I received an e-mail from an American I don't know (a co-worker of a friend of Kenny's). Instead of the typical Sehr geehrte Frau Barber*, I had a simple Dear Mary. Excuse me? We don't know eachother... distance, I need distance! I felt like my psychological personal space bubble had been burst.

But at least she knows my first name, unlike Stalker Boy.

Tsk, tsk.


*Highly Honoured Ms. Barber

On Work and Worrying

Work. It's more volatile and unpredictable than a bunch of tenth graders in a high school chemistry lab. Oooh, speaking of chemicals, aren't ulcers a result of excessive gastric acids? I think a feel a warm, fuzzy one coming.

Mary: I know that I do tend to worry a lot
Mary: bleh
Kenny: you've always been like that, so you take situations like this harder
Kenny: or you just find more to worry about!
Mary: I'm worried that I worry to much
Kenny: it might really go back to the old control issue
Kenny: exactly
Kenny: I'm really worried that you will worry about your worry too much
Mary: and now I'm worried that you're worrying about my worrying about my worry
Kenny: this whole thing is very troublesome

I miss my Vatti.

Life is a malignant-gastro-intestinal-peptic-ulcer.

The Periodic Table of Stuff*

Learning new German words is a daily (hourly?) event, and yesterday was no exception. As a matter of fact, I was introduced to a whole new world of vocabulary and ideas yesterday. A local College put on Science-Fair-Type-Event where different departments (biology, physics, mathematics, chemistry, etc.) displayed their various projects. Syd, The Little Rascal, Mariposa**, her brother and I went, and it was great fun. Though I had a throbbing headache afterwards from (a) too little drinking and (b) too much thinking.

For some reason, I got a kick out of the German names for the Elements. The names often end with the suffix "-stoff", which I found rather odd until discussing the issue with Leo. Until yesterday, I'd understood "Stoff" to mean "fabric/material/stuff"... but it also has other meanings: "matter/substance."

[Side Note: frequently, the German language will have one word for multiple ideas whereas English will split the ideas into multiple words.]

Hydrogen, for example, is Wasserstoff. "Water-stuff." Makes sense.

Nitrogen is Stickstoff, which supposedly comes from the word "ersticken" - "to suffocate/quench/smother." Why? Because in pure nitrogen, living things suffocate and fires are quenched. "Smother-stuff." Heh.

Oxygen is Sauerstoff, which was particularly perplexing. "Acidic-stuff." *scratches her head* There's an explanation, but I'll let it be (let it be, there will be an answer... let it be).

Carbon is Kohlenstoff. "Coal-stuff." Ok.

Something else I found odd is the fact that Germans have their own, non-Latin/Greek names for certain elements. Even Americans use Latin/Greek names (think: non-English) for most of the elements. I'd think that names would be universal in the scientific realm.

And the plot thickens... though they don't use Latin/Greek names, they use the same Periodic Table and abbreviations that we use. Yay for Scientific-Semi-Universality! The abbreviation for Wasserstoff would be H, for example. And I thought having to memorize Fe and Pb and other funky elemental exceptions was complicated.

Then again, Germans are notorious for complicating even the simplest of matters. Chemical matters being no exception. :)

But what-ev. It's all relative and meaningless, anyway.


Coming up next: Mary's dramatic 10th grade chemistry experience gone bad and an otherwise dull day in school turned into an exhilirating trip to the local hospital. Yup, it's true, folks.


*Elements

**a German friend who recently returned to Germany after spending a year in Mexico. She's awesome.

Journal Exctracts from the First Several Days

Around this time last year, I was in a British Airways plane, listening to my favourite boys and flying to Germany. It's hard to believe that approximately one year has already passed. There were so many uncertainties last year at this time... but as time has progressed, I've seen things work out and there's even some sense/meaning in the struggles. I don't know where or with whom I'll be next year at this time... but I know that God is good and trustworthy regardless of country/circumstance/time/location/etc.

I was reading through some old journals from last September, and found some funny blurbs you guys might enjoy. Here goes...

08.09.05, written in the Heathrow airport: "The people are so obviously European! It cracks me up... I don't know how exactly you can tell, but you can. There's just something different about them. The way they carry themselves; the look; the style."

10.09.05, written in the hotel: "Independence! It's a beautiful, yet scary, thing. And I'm still trying to figure it all out.

11.09.05, written in the hotel: "I think, I really do, that things are going to be ok here... the only times I've freaked have been in the morning when I wake up and think, 'where am I and what the heck have I done?' "

Ah, life. My bittersweet symphony.

Positive Sayings Gone Bad

*tee hee*

Because Bizarro's on vacation, it's possible once again to say negative things such as "Das Leben ist ein Jammertal" without getting yelled at or slapped. So... while I'm at it, why not go ahead and change common, positive sayings into dreary epitaphs?

We have to thank Beatrice for this one: The light at the end of the tunnel is headlights from the train that's about to run you over. And you're usually the positive thinker, Beatrice!

Then there's the lovely saying that it's always darkest just before the stars come out, or something along those lines. But I say: it's always darkest just before it goes pitch black.

Anyway.

I always miss my Mamita. And now I miss Bizarro Mom, too. :)

The Update Post

Blog Logistic Update: As many of you know, I appreciate and enjoy your comments (unless they're degrading comments from Leo). So... if you look at the column on the right side of this blog, you'll see a section titled "And You Said..." Those are your most recent comments. By clicking on a name, you can go directly to the comment and read what you wrote.

Driver's License Update: This is still an open issue, and in the process of being clarified. The reason I haven't kept this issue up-to-date is because (1.) it changes practically every day and with every phone call and (2.) it's leading to insanity and premature greying. I could seriously devote an entire blog to this mess, but would rather not.

Boy Update: The answer is still a resounding "no", though I *gasp* held someone's hand the other day... but it wasn't like that. Just thought I'd throw that one out there to shock everyone back home. :)

Life in General Update: Slightly confusing. Interesting. Challenging. A little bittersweet. Generally manageable.

Sunday Morning Music, Revolts and Comparison Abolition (or, Eleanor's hubby finally has his own nickname)

Well, today we had another Magical Sunday Morning Musical Experience. Neal was the Moderator, so of course he, Helmut, Cruiser* and I had to stir things up a little bit. And by "stir things up", I mean that Neal played an acoustic-drum-box-thing, and we sang three songs in a row (normally, there are readings or announcements between songs). It went well, and the reactions were all positive.

Quite a few people in our church are extremely musically gifted, and it's been a joy and privelege being able to play with them and learn from them. A couple have even written and recorded some of their own music and have CDs out... so we're talking real pros here. :)

Afterwards, over the usual post-church-service-coffee-and-cookies, several of us had a very interesting and lively conversation about music in general, music in the church, interaction and cooperation between band members, and various musical styles. 'Twas very helpful. I often find myself comparing my piano playing with Syd's, but as he and several others have said... no one plays better... we simply play different.

Syd: "You need to stop saying that I play better than you."
Mary: "Em..."
Syd: "We play differently and each have our own style. One's not better than the other."
Mary: "But sometimes different is better."
Syd: "Yeah, you're right... I'm much better than you."

Actually, only the first 3/5 of that conversation actually occurred. :)

And differences are what make the world a Fascinating Magical Mystery Tour.

Seriously, the more I play, the more I actually enjoy it. Sure, it's still a little nerve-wracking because so many of the songs are new, and I still get nervous playing in front of large groups of people... but overall it's been a good, healthy challenge.


Lyric of the Day: "Roll up (and that's an invitation)... roll up (to make a reservation)... roll up (we've got everything you need)... roll up (satisfaction guaranteed)... roll up for the Mystery Tour." (Thanks to the Beatles)


*Eleanor's husband, who finally has his own, personal nickname! *gives a standing ovation* He's a guitar-and-bass-guitar-playing-fiend, as well as one of the church Elders, right up there with Mr. P. *oooooh*

Run!

Hello, allow me to introduce myself. My name is Mary Elizabeth and I'm socially awkward with funky hang-ups.

For one of the first times since being here, I felt really weird and out of place. It's no one's fault but my own, though I'd like to think that the situation played a significant role. I've never done well in large groups of people, especially when I feel like everyone already knows eachother and has some sort of history together.

Sometimes I wish I were more outgoing or chatty or spontaneous or "crazy", but that's simply not the way I'm wired. I can't completely let loose and be crazy unless I'm very comfortable with someone and have known them for a semi-long time. I can't be silly and chat/ramble on about nonsense, so I'll often say nothing. Sure, there's a wild side, but it only emerges with certain people or when the situation is just right.

It's like George* with Frogger (an arcade game in a fatty fast food joint)... to beat the high score, there has to be just the right amount of grease on the joystick and you have to have just the right balance of grease and caffeine in your system.

Obviously, my grease-caffeine ratio is off-balance.


Lyric of the Day: "I want to see you... to see you high and lifted up, shining in the light of your glory. Pour out your power and love, as we sing 'holy, holy holy.' Holy, holy, holy... I want to see you." (thanks to a singer/songwriter unknown)


*here's a Seinfeld reference for you, Shelby!

Sound Girl and Sidekick are BACK!

I'd like to take this post to express, in response to a comment from the infamous Sound Girl* herself, my deepest sympathies for excluding her, Sidekick** and Tall Guy*** (though he's arguably, assumably and unfortunately out of the picture and thus arguably, assumably and unfortunately oughtn't be included) from my current writings.

Sound Girl, thanks for dropping out of Oblivion!

I was actually reading through some old journals the other day, and I found where I'd listed all of my HCCSA classmates... but not just a list of names, of course... I'd also listed their nicknames and my general opinion of them, as well as rated them based on various characteristics (purely objective, mind you). Oh, the confu-sed mind of a high-schooler. Sound Girl and Tall Guy were there, right at the top, of course. :)

I kind of miss stalking *ahem* a certain boy during lunch period, egging cars, and reading interesting short stories in Mrs. Jackson's class. Those were some weird, messed up times.

Thank goodness I transferred to public school, though... that definitely solved all my problems. :)


*goes into a strange-reflective-trance-like-stupor-state*


Lyric of the Day: "I will paint my picture, paint myself in blue and red and black and gray. All of the beautiful colors are very very meaningful... Mr. Jones and me, we're gonna be big stars." (Thanks to Counting Crows)


*Sound Girl: The Keeper of the High School Sound System

**Sidekick: Her Trusty Accomplice (yup, that'd be me)

***Tall Guy: Sidekick's, em, five-year-long secret crush (though it was obvious)

Music Seminar :)

Yesterday, Syd and I went to a seminar in Wiedenest on music in the church. It was very interesting* and informative, and there were a couple ideas I'd like to maybe try out. I'm the type (and I think Syd is, too) who has to sit on information for a while, and internally process it and think it through before coming to conclusions. So... we shall see what practically becomes of our theory.

Generally, though, I think our church is on the right track, and headed in the right direction.

The speaker said that two things determine people's reaction to music - specifically, music that's not in their preferred style: their relationship with God and their love for another. For example, if you're excited about God and want to praise Him, it won't matter to you whether it be with organ music or with drums and a guitar. And if you love others in the church, you'll be more willing to compromise.

Fortunately, I'm fond of all types of music, so this isn't much of an issue for me personally. Though I'd like to think that if the youth, for example, wanted to integrate rap music (one of the few genres I can't stand) into our worship time, I'd be open.

Lalala.

When we first got there, we saw an enticing grand piano in one of the rooms, and during the break, we had to test it out, of course. The main entrance was locked by then, but where there's a will, there's a way... so we managed to sneak in through the back entrance. Reminded me of the good ol' days in the MSC**, in a way. Anyway, 'twas a lovely piano, and Syd's playing was as lovely as ever, and the Green-Eyed Monster*** was as vicious as ever. But the necessary combat steps are being taken.

*scratches her head*

I still kind of want to quit work and start a band... or maybe a Gregorian-chant-singing Choir.


Lyric of the day: "Locus iste a deo factus est. Inestimabile sacramentum. Irreprehensibilis est." (Thanks to Die Beinahe Sechs)


*in the German sense of the word, Eleanor! :)

**Memorial Student Center at A&M

***to my dear German readers: the "Green-Eyed Monster" is jealousy... don't ask why... ist einfach so. :)

Music Books from Bizarro Mom!

This evening was like Christmas!! Everyone came over for Bible Study, and Bizarro Mom gave me five of the most commonly used Praise & Worship books! Craziness! They're really fabulous resources - all the German songs we sing are in the books, as well as many English songs, translated into German.

Now, the next step is to return the stolen books I've been using for the past several months. Syd was the first person to get his book back. (Thanks for letting me borrow it, by the way - though you didn't have much of a choice :)

I'm excited. Muah.

Thanks, Bizarro Mom!

International License... on the way...

*ring ring*

Mamita: "Guess what I sent you in the mail today..."
Mary: "I think I know... but what???"
Mamita: "Your international driver's license."
Mary: *squeeeeeeeee!* "THANK YOU!!!"

Hopefully it'll be valid here... but I'm trying to psychologically prepare myself in case it isn't. Because if it isn't, I'm afraid you all will be witnesses of The Emotional Break-down of the Century. Nah, not really. But I will be very ticked off, to put it lightly and politely.

Thanks, Mom!

Boys are Evil Creatures (well, some of them, at least)

I fortunately made it through the weekend without running into Stalker Boy, who was in town. One of my friends, who spent Saturday working with him, informed me that he'd asked about me... well, asked about me, depending on how you define "me." Actually, he asked about "Melanie Barber."

Ok, I admit that I'm bad with names. And I'm the first to forgive people who forget my name. But seriously... I'd think that a guy who called me two to four times a day for a week and a half straight, forced me to screen my calls and go into cardiac arrest every the phone rang, hunted down my work number and called unexpectedly during work, showed up uninvited at my appartment, asked multiple people if I was ok and why I wasn't returning his phone calls, suggested he spend his day off in Neukirchen, suggested we go to Holland together, and suggested we go to the Black Forest together would at least remember my freaking name.

I'm not Melanie. Or Martha. Or Melissa. Or Margaret. Or Artemis-Diana. It's Mary, so if you happen to be a guy who's going to stalk me, then at least get the name right, YOU CREEP.

And some advice to stalkers: remembering the name is key. After all, if you don't know the name, how can you find someone's address if they've moved to avoid you? And how can you track down their phone number when they've changed it to avoid your phone calls?

It's common sense, my pretty little stalkers, common sense.

Sunday conversations and thoughts on decisions

Today was encouraging, as I feel like a step forward was taken, in the sense that some long-waited conversations occured. Such occurences substantiate my thoughts that there's some (sometimes unknown) reason for me being here, in this part of the world during this particular time.

In context with certain conversations, I was thinking about decisions, and I've come to two conclusions. These are conclusions I've had tucked in the back of my mind for some time, but they mean more at this point than before.

1. One decision can literally change your entire life. Whether it be a good/bad/right/wrong decision, once you've made it and once you've gone there, there's no turning back. No un-doing. No re-winding. No escaping.

2. Major wrong decisions are often the result of a chain of smaller wrong decisions. You wouldn't wake up one day and deliberately make a poor decision (unless you're simply dumb and apathetic). Each supposedly tiny step you take in the wrong direction makes taking a slightly larger step in the wrong direction all the easier. And the well-known-downward-spiral...

Now, to tie it all together in a succinctly comprehensible manner: make wise decisions, whether they be crucial or seemingly trite.

The hard part is when things aren't black and white, and there are multiple "good" decisions... but that's a topic for another day.

On Ecclesiastes, the Future, Control, Worrying and Creepy Stalker Boy

I'm still alive... just trying to sort some things out, which means spending more time doing other things and less time blogging. Gotta love the vagueness, but sometimes it's necessary.

Some of us have been reading through Ecclesiastes together, and a couple of verses were particularly enlightening: chapter 8, verses 6-8.

"For there is a proper time and procedure for every matter, though a man's misery weighs heavily upon him. Since no man knows the future, who can tell him what is to come? No man has power over the wind to contain it; so no one has power over the day of his death."

Assuming that these verses are true and that I myself am included in "no man", then there's no way for me to know the future, and no way for me to completely control everything. This doesn't mean I can shirk responsibility, go passive, or slip into apathy... but it does mean that there are things I simply can't know and can't control. I've thus decided to make a very deliberate and conscious effort not to worry, stress or freak out about certain things.

Sure, no man can know the future or have power over the wind or the day of his death. But I'm going to take a leap and say that God knows this kind of thing. I'd also say that He has pretty much everything under control.

*takes a deep breath and slowly exhales*

On a lighter note, I learned yesterday that Stalker Boy is going to be in town this weekend. And he'll probably be floating around my street and the church... which poses a problem, as I want/need to play the piano today. After much debating, I've decided to take the risk and venture to the church. I shouldn't let silly boys control how I spend my Saturday afternoons, even if they are under the Creepy Stalker Boy Category.

Driver's License Update

I... think... *crosses her fingers*... that... a solution has been found!

Let's take a moment to applaud and promote Triple A* for so brilliantly supporting me in my plot to somehow obtain driving rights without having to repeat the practical test. For the fourth time (and maybe even more).

I spoke with a Triple A rep (in English!) this afternoon:

Guster: "Thank you for calling Triple A, how may I help you?"
Mary: "Well, I'm living overseas, specifically in Germany, and a slight problem has developed... a problem that I think your International Driving Permit could solve."
Guster: "Indeed. All you need to do is fill out the application, send us a copy of your Texas license and two passport photos, and ten US dollars."
Mary: "That's all? But it's so easy. And cheap. It's impossible."
Guster: "Oh, but it is possible. In Germany, everything is geregelt and complicated, but part of our job here at Triple A is to find ways around those annoying and nasty little rules."
Mary: "Brilliance. Sheer brilliance."
Guster: "After all... we're Americans. If we think rules are annoying, then we have to fight them and find ways around them. This especially includes rules in foreign countries."
Mary: "But of course."
Guster: "Is there anything else I can help you with?"
Mary: "Actually, yes. Is there any way you could orchestrate a shipment of toxic waste to be sent to a horrid little driving school in Moers?"
Guster: "As you wish."
Mary: "I think I love you."

Now, let's hope that he's right, and that this actually works... and that he follows through with the shipment.


*American version of ADAC

Sentimentalities and the Music Genome Project of Sheer Brilliance

I really like life here, and the fact that I feel like my life here is being threatened is making me realize just how much I like it.

I love the people, my little group, my church... I like my job, my appartment, and my little fairy-tale-esque-cobble-stoned-street town. And I want to stay here for now.

*tear*

Anyway, on a lighter note... I normally don't promote websites here, but thanks to myspace and various people from my past hunting me down, I've been made aware of a fabulous internet radio site:

http://www.pandora.com

It began as a project, the Music Genome Project, and here's the description:

"Together we set out to capture the essence of music at the most fundamental level. We ended up assembling literally hundreds of musical attributes or "genes" into a very large Music Genome. Taken together these genes capture the unique and magical musical identity of a song - everything from melody, harmony and rhythm, to instrumentation, orchestration, arrangement, lyrics, and of course the rich world of singing and vocal harmony. It's not about what a band looks like, or what genre they supposedly belong to, or about who buys their records - it's about what each individual song sounds like."*

So... what you, as the listener, can do is enter in a favourite song or artist, and the radio will automatically generate similar-sounding songs. It's freaking brilliant.

The "catch" is that you have to register... all they want is a name, an e-mail address and a US zipcode. If any of my German friends want to register, feel free to use my Texas zipcode: 78681. :)

I've recently gotten into some new music genres I've never listened to before, which means I'm unfamiliar with artists in that particular genre. Pandora's helped me discover other similar musicians, and it's really been great fun.


*Source: Music Genome Project

On Life, Writing and Anvils*

Sometimes it's difficult being an aspiring-writer-wanna-be, especially when I'm trying to peel myself off the pavement cause life just dropped a forty-ton anvil on me and my bicycle.

*thinks about what to write*

It's not as if I'm lacking "material." Quite the contrary: the material's all here, nicely coupled with abnormally high amounts of mental energy exertion and sleep deprivation. Throw in monthly medication overdoses (it's great being a woman) and the fact that many prominent composers, musicians, philosophers and artists were actually insane... and I definitely have potential.

Ok, let's add it up:

ideas (mental energy) + time (sleep deprivation) + more ideas (medication) + creativity (insanity) = increased potential. I obviously have everything going for me... so why the inability to ingeniously solve life's problems and record it in entertainingly witty and clever blogs on the side?

But alas... here I sit, pondering what to write next, and waiting for the next anvil to drop out of the overcast sky.


* please take nothing** I write seriously

** almost everything

Sunshine

You are my Sunshine, my only Sunshine...
You make me happy when skies are gray.
You'll never know, Dear, how much I love you...
So, please, don't take my Sunshine away.

- thanks to an Unknown Author

Lake in the Sun (without injuries or fatalities)

Today was hilarious. Families with boys are so different than families with only girls... coming from a family with four girls (and two loving parental units, of course), I never cease to be shocked/ amazed/ horrified by some of the stunts that guys pull. My chicas and I pulled our share of stunts... but ours usually didn't put our lives in physical danger. What really gets me when it comes to families with guys is all that the parents allow and the fact that they don't freak out.

Today, for example, I went to the lake with some of the youth from church (yeah, I'm still torn between being a grown-up and a miscreant-juvenile). It was quite the procession: a tractor with a trailor, a Trabi*, and a Moped.

To get to the water, you had to climb down a small bank... of course, the guys wanted to jump from the bank into the water, but it was too shallow. So, Someone (Syd, was that you?) had the brilliant idea of parking the trailor on the very edge of the bank, giving them a platform to run and jump off of. I can't imagine my sisters and I doing something like that! The idea in and of itself would have arguably been considered a Thoughtcrime by my dear Father.

And the greatest part was coming home and telling Mr. P, Bizarro and Eleanor about what we'd done... they didn't even think twice! As a matter of fact, they got a kick out of it.

Craziness.


*Trabant, an old East German car. How do you double it's value? Fill it with gas. Ha. Ha. Ha.

Island in the Sun?

After much deliberation and cogitation, I've decided I'd like to be a subsistence farmer on a random island in the sun. A day consisting of berry-picking, contemplative walks on the beach and reading is sounding rather nice.

The plan is to start looking for a boat this weekend, and then give away all my stuff (if there's something in particular you'd like - say, a CD or a book, for example - let me know) and paddle away next weekend. I have some money saved up, so I could have emergency items such as blank notebooks, chocolate bars and contact lenses helicoptered in.

The only foreseeable problem is the lack of a piano.

Hmm...

Life Theory Validations and Rain

Yesterday, I rode my bike through the rain for the first time. On the one hand, it was an annoying pain. But on the other hand, the masochistic pessimist in me kind of wanted it to rain, just so my cynical Life Theories* could be validated, which they were.

So, the classic Battle Between Optimism and Pessimism...

Mary: "It's raining and I'm feeling cold, wet, gross and annoyed."
Laura**: "Be positive. It could be raining harder."
Mary: *rolls her eyes* "Or it could be sun-shiny."
Laura: "Or it could be colder... and, say, snowing instead of drizzling."
Mary: "Or I could be driving. And I could have passed my test. The first time. Or the second time. Or maybe even the third time."
Laura: "At least you have a bike. And someone was kind enough to give it to you!"
Mary: "But I also have Scaramouche... and she's disintigrating in the garage."
Laura: "It could be a ton worse; believe me."
Mary: "I know, I know. I could swerve in front of this approaching 18-wheeler, for instance."
Laura: "WATCH OUT!!!"

And so it went.

The Never-ending Mental Battle. If the Battle is exclusively in your mind, between you and yourself, does that mean that (a) it truly is never-ending and (b) there's no way to ever win it?

Or, as Laura would say, there's no way you can lose it.

At least there's one thing in life I'm sure of: if you bike outside in the rain without an umbrella or rain jacket, you get *bleeping* soaked.



*Life is a Valley of Misery. Meaningless, meaningless, everything is meaningless. Life is an A-minor song. Etc.

**my positive alter-ego

Majors to Minors

Music-wise, this was an excellent week, and progress has been made. At least one area of my life is positive and progressing, right?

As our dear church pianist has been sailing around Croatia for the past two Sundays, Helmut and I had the joy and privelege of leading the music again. Last week, we played this song that was in a painfully major key, and even sounded like "America, the Beautiful" in certain parts. Let's just say that it didn't help the given situation.

So, as we were practicing, I had the brilliant idea of slowing the song down and changing it to a minor key. You know... it's possible to take a nice, positive upbeat song and make it hauntingly melancholy by changing merely a few notes around. Of course, as a general rule, misery loves company, so we decided to share our little dirge with others and play it as the prelude the following week at church. Which is what we did this morning.

To make it more climactic, we played the original melody first, and then did an obvious and semi-dramatic switch from major to minor, and followed it up with two rounds purely in the new, realistic minor key. It was lovely and fun in a kind of weird, twisted way.

I've also been working on the Funeral March by Chopin, which would make a charming little Sunday morning prelude. There's nothing like a nice funeral march to get your day started off right.


Lyric of the Day: "Oh beautiful, for patriot's dream that sees beyond the years... thine alabaster cities gleam, undimmed by human tears." (Thanks to an unknown author)

Or...?

It's due time for something good/ funny/ entertaining/ unusual/ happy/ different to happen.

For instance... why can't a Steinway drop out of the sky and land on my balcony? Or John Lennon come back from the dead and smoke hookah with me? Or I have a brilliant idea that changes the world? Or I miraculously develop Sydney-like-improv abilities? Or Constantine give a concert within biking distance of my flat? Or the world morph into Candyland?* Or the local grocery stores carry non-liquid deoderant? Or I not be so clingy, delusional and dependent? Or the driving school go up in flames? Or little elves wash my windows and mop my floors? Or I figure out the meaning of life?

Maybe someday...


*a children's boardgame, where the world is happy and made out of candy. I used to wish I were "Queen Frostine", the queen who ruled an island in a sea of ice cream. Em, I actually kind of still wish I were Queen Frostine.

Slightly Homesick

I watched my soul as she flew away
Half-way 'round the world today.
She had enough of life's frustrations,
Analysis and complications.

Now she's far across the ocean,
Rolling waves and tides away.
My sweetest five, with my devotion,
Unlike all others, eternally.

I'm... feeling... slightly... homesick... but... just... slightly.

Driving test...

Em... bad news again. I've really never fared well under pressure, and as far as I know, there's nothing I can do about it.

*sigh*

Heat Strike! (Or, someone from TX please send me a care package w/ an AC unit! ASAP!)

Going on a heat strike and refusing to work until air conditioning units are installed is becoming a more appealing option with each passing day. It's time to contact the Betriebsrat*, folks. One thing I never liked about Texas is the heat... and it's almost as bad here.

Mary: "This is disgusting. Sweating is disgusting and should be avoided at all costs."
Miscellaneous German People: "But you're from Texas!!"
Mary: "That doesn't mean I want to live in a sauna."
MGP.: "But you're used to the heat!"
Mary: "And I'm also used to air conditioners."

Air conditioners. They're marvelous inventions that technologically modern Germans have, for some reason, refused to incorporate into their daily lives. The result? Sitting in a stuffy office, chugging water by the liter to avoid dehydration, running around barefoot in the office, wearing semi-scandalous-non-professional clothes when I have no meetings, heat headaches, and early wrinkles due to squinting.

One nice thing, though, is "Hitzefrei." This is what younger school children (and sweaty employees) have when it's too warm and impossible to work: you simply give up and go home early for the day. And it's allowed.

I've got a fever, and the only prescription is an AC unit!!


*a council who works for the employee's benefits/rights

Operation Lightbulb Exchange

How many stereotype-defying, delusional 23-year-old Austinites living in Neukirchen-Vluyn does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

em...

hmm...

ONE! And she doesn't need a man to help her, either. (Sorry, Kenny - you know I love you.)

Doing the dishes, however, is another story...

Uncle Dub'ya in Deutschland

Well, folks, George W. Bush made it to Germany this past week. The goal? To discuss current world issues* and foster the US-Germany relationship over barbeque. And as far as I know, he neither embarassed himself (or the US) or spilled barbeque sauce on his clothes. *breathes a sigh of relief* Progress is being made.

In order to give a nice impression and keep rabid protesters from attacking, they met in a little town called Stralsund, where approximately 12,000 police were on duty. There were less protestors than expected, though, which was a nice surprise.

It's interesting... several German people I've talked with think that Angela Merkel's** beliefs and actions don't accurately reflect what the majority of German citizens think or would do. For example, they think she's too soft and permissive when it comes to Bush and US foreign policy and behaviour.

Anyway. He was only in Germany for a couple of days... so the whole thing was more of a political show than anything else. And an expensive one at that - the whole thing cost Germany between 14 and 20 million Euros.

I was invited to the Grill Party with him and Angie, but was unfortunately unable to make it cause my driver's license is invalid.


*or the World Soccer Cup, that is

**the German Chancellor

Chords...

I've developed a new fascination: Chords. Until recently, I've simply played the exact notes on the page when playing the piano. In the past several months, however, I've begun to discover an entirely new world of of music in Chords, the way they operate, the way they overlap, and their patterns. I never realized that music has such a mechanical/technical side (sure, I've had a little music theory... but never thought about what it means practically!), but it most certainly does. And it's fascinating.

Helmut and I have been getting together to practice various songs for the coming Sundays, as our dear Pianist will be out and about. He's shown me some common chord patterns that quite a few songs use... for example, we played several very different songs, all with the chords A minor, F major, and G major. One song had a C major thrown in, but other than that, it was a simple circle of the three aforementioned chords.

Forget the Drehleier... I think I want to start a band, afterall.


Positive Quote of the Day: "Every cloud has a silver lining."

British English *tee hee*

British English. Why is it so intriguing? Maybe because I've only seen mass quantities of people speak like that in the movies, so I somehow assumed "real people" don't speak it. Oh, but they do. It's different, it's proper, and it's hilarious. I'm going to list some BE words with their American English equivalents, for your reading pleasure.

boot: trunk (of a car)

lovey/darling: sweetie/honey (what you'd call a child)

nappy: diaper

rubish bin: trash can

right: ok

fortnight: two weeks

Mum: Mom (yes, they really spell it with a 'u')

coffee: cheap, watered-down instant coffee

tea time: dinner/supper time

biscuits: cookies

give way: yield (street sign)

motorway: highway

to collect: to pick up (as in a child or someone from the airport)

to wash up: to do the dishes

washing up liquid: dishwashing soap

plait: braid (a hairstyle)

trousers: pants (for either men or women)

pants: men's underwear

knickers: women's underwear

Ok, now for a rather embarassing conversation I had with a man I'd just met... background information is that Gladys had a birthday party with the Sound of Music as the theme, which means that some people dressed up in Dirndls and Lederhosen.

Brit: "Is this ok to wear to the party tonight?"
Mary: *jokingly* "Don't you have any Lederhosen? The theme is Sound of Music."
Brit: "Lederhosen? What's that?"
Mary: "They're leather pants... it's the traditional clothes for men in Bavaria and Austria."
Brit: "Leather pants?"
Mary: *wonders why he's looking at her weird* "Yeah... leather pants. I think they'd look good on you."
Brit: "Oh... I have to run and check on the barbeque."

I later realized that in BE, 'pants' specifically means 'men's underwear'... what I should have said is 'trousers.' So... yes... I'd told a man I'd just met that I think he'd look rather nice in leather underwear. Scandalous!

BIOMUELL AMBUSH!!! (Or, Biomuell, Part III)

Augh!!! Just when I thought my Biomuell and I had taken a few steps forward in the right direction, he turned on me when I was least expecting it! He was cruel; he was manipulative; and he stunk (like the last guy I was semi-interested in).

Seriously, folks, I'm an idiot. A complete idiot.

Readers: "Oh, no you're not! You frequently do stupid things, but I wouldn't call you an idiot."
Mary: "You obviously haven't finished reading this post. It'll change your opinion."

Allow me to explain what happened between me and my Biomuell...

Thursday, as I was getting ready to leave for England, I thought of a conversation I'd had with Bizarro and Syd the evening before. The topic was my evil little electrical box... they informed me that if I pushed the primary switch downwards, it'd shut off all the electricity and water in my appartment. If you're gone for extended periods of time (key word: extended), flicking this little switch would be the clever thing to do. Being the genius I am, I decided to turn it off for the weekend... ya know... save some energy (it's the German way) and prevent anyone from using my washing machine, which is in the basement where everyone has access to it.

*click*

The Point of No Return.

Well, as I was returning home from the airport (thanks, Helmut, for picking me up!), I was thinking about how lovely a tall glass of chocolatey milk would be.

See where this is heading...?

Well, when I got home, the first thing I did was head to the fridge... and lo and behold... all my food had morphed into BIOMUELL!!! All I wanted was a cold glass of milk and maybe a joghurt. But instead I have heaps of reaking Biomuell that I have to deal with. Yeah, when killing the electricity, the fact that the fridge really ought to keep running somehow slipped my mind. Freaking idiot.

Das Leben ist ein Biomuellberg. Life is a mountain of biological waste.

England for the Weekend

Today, it's off to England to visit Gladys! I'll be back Sunday afternoon with interesting stories and a thick English accent. :)

Choir Pictures...

Today feels like a Picture Day as opposed to a Word Day... so... here are some pictures from our Choir summer party a couple of weeks ago.


Lounging around and talking... what a life.


Here I am with my dear fellow Alto Singer. :)



Thanks to Narcissus Helmut playing the guitar, we spent much of the evening singing praise songs under the stars...



One of the neighbor's cows escaped, so Biff tried to chase him back...



Hehe, I brought marshmallows for us to roast, which was fun. Everyone was fascinated by them, which was hilarious. Well, except Bizarro - she thinks they're too gooey/messy.



This picture makes me miss my Mom, who'd probably tell me not to sit on the ground in a nice skirt (a) cause it'd get dirty and (b) cause ladies probably shouldn't do such things. :(



It really was a lovely evening.

Life is a... bowl of cherries*

Or, in a very literal sense... life is eight buckets of cherries. Well, at least in Hoerstgen**, where Bizarro and Syd and fam live. And I have pictures to prove it. :)

They have a huge cherry tree in their front yard, and we spent the afternoon picking and eating cherries.



Here we are up in the tree...




And, another tree picture... here, you can kind of see how high we were. They have a fork-lift which lifted a platform up into the tree...




And, the fruits of our labour. You can only see 6.5 buckets here... it's because we'd already canned 1.5 bucket-fulls.




Bizarro taught me how to can cherries, which was great fun... here, I was shaking the jar to try to pack more cherries in.


The excessive-cherry-consumption-stomach-ache at the end of the day was definitely worth it.


*to my dear German readers: saying that life is a bowl of cherries is comparable to saying that life is a Ponyhof or a Zuckerschlecken. :)

**the center of the Universe

And the results are in, folks...

As many of you know, I had my practical driving test this morning... and... I failed it. For the second time. Seriously.

It's bewildering, really. So many people have been so supportive, both in words and in prayer (you know who you are - THANK YOU!!! You're precious to me!). I even gave the whole issue over to God. I knew I couldn't pass it on my own, so I told Him that if He wants me to pass, then He'll have to intervene and work a miracle. At the same time, I said Thy will be done.

So... I'm going to take a leap and assume that God is real and is Who He says He is. If this is true, then He's a God Who takes care of His children and hears their prayers. Which means He heard our prayers... and the answer was evidently, "no." Or "not yet." Sure, it's baffling, frustrating and discouraging... but I trust that, for some as-of-yet-unknown reason, I'm not meant to pass the test and drive at this point.

I've learned a ton in the past several weeks... maybe there's something I'm still missing or not seeing. We'll see.

Forward, soldiers.

*smiles a weak smile, but a smile nonetheless*

:)