Photo Re-cap of Kat's Visit

So much has happened in the two weeks that Kat was here, that it's difficult to even know where to begin and what to write. Not only did she have a glimpse into my every-day life here in NR-W, but we also traveled around quite a bit. She was able to meet most everyone here, as well as see some interesting sights. It was a wonderful two weeks, but also strange in many ways... I often joke about having different "worlds", but I really think it's true. These past weeks were a collision of German and American worlds, as well as the past and the present worlds.

Anyway. Let's save the sentimental reflection for another day.

Here are some of my favourite pictures from her visit... to make the picture larger, simply click on it.


Of course we had to spend a day at Bizarro Mom's when Kat was here... one of the favourite pasttimes is going for rides on the tractor. They also have a Ferrari, but unfortunately I don't have a picture of it.



After going on the tractor ride, we sat around in the backyard and talked and even looked at old photo albums. 'Twas quite cute.



Here's a typical day at Bizarro's: comfortably crowded, with tons of people in the kitchen either helping or sampling. :)



Much of or vacation was spent on the road... it was about 630 km to Friedberg, our old hometown.



Here's a typical Autobahn sign... you can see our exit, "Augsburg-Ost." In the States the highway signs are green, aren't they...?



Here's a picture of Friedberg from the road. I knew we were close as soon as I saw the church steeple...



Here's the church from close-up... ah, this brings back memories.



We stayed with some family friends while in Friedberg... here's the mom. She's crazy! She's a nurse, so she and Kat had a good time talking about things like appendicitis, goiters, urinary tract infections and various intravenous shot techniques. During mealtimes.



Here's Kat and their daughter (who stayed with us for a month or so in Texas a few years back) at the kitchen table...



We went to Neuschwanstein while in Bavaria... heh, and Kat thought Neukirchen-Vluyn was a fairytale! She took this pic while standing in the middle of the Marienbruecke, which is a horrid, rickety, extremely high bridge.



Here she is standing on the bridge... *shudders*



Here's a pic I took while standing on the bridge... I know you probably can't tell how high it is from the picture, but let me tell you, it was creepy standing there and looking down through those huge spaces between the bridge planks.



Here we are, in front of the castle, waiting for our tour to begin.



We spent one afternoon/evening with some other family friends... here we are, sitting in their living room. I remembered them, of course, from a long time ago, but this time I got to know them on a more adult-level, which was very interesting. My parents have cool friends. :)



After having cake and coffee, we went for a stroll in Augsburg. Here's the house where Mozart's father was born...




Bertholt Brecht, a German writer/poet, also grew up in Augsburg, and here's a museum devoted to him. I'd read/seen some of his work while at the University, so it was neat seeing where he'd lived and grown up. Ok, trivia time... did you guys know that the song "Mack the Knife" originally comes from a German opera called the "Die Dreigroschenoper" by Brecht? Pretty nifty, hmm? :) I was rather amused by the fact that everyone in town calls him "Bert" Brecht instead of "Bertholt" Brecht. It's like saying "Wolle Mozart" or "Freddie Haendel." It just sounds a little, well, off.



After walking around town, we went to a little restaurant. We had a typical Bavarian meal: sausages, saurkraut and Spaetzle. Mmm...



Here's our old street, Gaertnerweg...



Here's our old house, Gaertnerweg 15. I even remember our old phone number. *Sniff sniff*. Yes, we ended up knocking on the door and asking if we could look inside, and the lady let us. It was so weird.



Kat and I took a walk through our old neighborhood and found some dandelions on the way. :)



Segmueller is a store we used to go to when we were kids... so of course my shop-a-holic sis and I had to return. We actually bought a lava lamp there, which is much more interesting than watching television. :)



There's a little cafe' in the middle of Segmueller where we used to eat Butterbreze, or buttered pretzels. Delicious!



These pretzels are making me thirsty!



We spent one day with some other family friends (the lady happens to be my current boss!). Here we are playing shuffleboard. My boss told me she hopes my shuffleboard playing doesn't reflect my cost-center controlling. Um. What's that supposed to mean?



And another picture... this is in their living room.



Hehe, I just had to upload one of these pictures... the appartment above mine is empty*, and Bizarro (who's also my renter, in case you forgot) wants to put some pictures of it on the internet. So, Kat and I (well, mainly Kat) "modeled" on some of them. It was awkward!!!



After the photo shoot, we hung out at my place for a while. (That's Sydney sitting between me and Kat).



One of our favourite desserts is Spaghetti Eis, or spaghetti ice cream. What they do is take plain ol' vanilla ice cream and put it through a press so it looks like spaghetti. Then they pour strawberry sauce over it and top it off with shredded white chocolate. In the middle is a healthy dose of whipped cream.



One last picture... we're sitting by a fountain in Friedberg. 'Twas a beautiful day.



It was sad taking her to the airport today, but we talked about it... she has a life to live in Austin, and needs to get back to her church and to figure out what exactly she's going to do this summer. And I have my life here. Sure, good-byes are hard, but we need to be thankful for the time we had together.


Lyric of the day: "And I have no concept of time other than it is flying... if only I could meet the Maker." (Thanks to Alanis)


*If anyone wants to move to Germany, the appartment above mine is available. And I have plenty of pictures of it if you'd like to see more. :)

Back in Neukirchen-Vluyn...

Voila. And we made it back. Time certainly flies, whether it be four days or fourteen years.

On the Road to München...

Just wanted to let everyone know that I'm going to be taking a brief break (think: a week or so) from writing because Kat and I are going to München tomorrow morning. Yes, the road trip to re-discover our childhood roots... should be interesting.

This past week has been a collision of my American and German Worlds... and next week will be a collision of our Past and Present. It's a strange, strange feeling. Sometimes I feel rather torn and confused, but that's better than boredom and mediocrity, right?

Right?


Lyric of the day: "Little town, it's a quiet village... every day, like the one before. Little town, full of little people..." (Thanks to Beauty and the Beast and Kat thinking that life here is fairy-tale-like).

Status Driver's License Test: PASSED!!!

I PASSED MY THEORETICAL* DRIVER'S LICENSE TEST THIS MORNING!!!

Man, it feels good to have that behind me. And it felt great screaming/singing with Alanis on the way home afterwards.

If the horrid practice tests I've been studying were actually mine, Katherine and I would celebrate by making a bonfire out of them this evening and roasting marshmallows... but that's unfortunately not an option.

So... I guess I'll just gather them up, give them back to Sydney, and never look at them again in my life! MUAH!


*the practical test is the next step... but I'm not going to think about it until after Kat's visit.

Katinka-dabogana in Deutschland!

well, i'm finally here in germany!! yay!!! by the way, this is katherine (also known as katinka dabogana). it was a long flight, without much sleep thanks to the grande starbucks coffee i had in atlanta, but it's definitely worth it!! we've had so much fun already, and it's only been two days! one of the first things we did yesterday was take a nice stroll down the street through the middle of town. the little town reminds me of a fairytail, so we sang a song from beauty and the beast as we passed by the bakery :-) it was great. after that, we went and got spaghetti eis!!! i haven't had that in about 14 years. last night was bible study at mary's appartment. it was so neat to hang out with all of the people that i've been hearing about. we sang some songs in german and english -- it's always cool to hear praise music sung in a different language. today mary woke me up nice and early (around 1pm) and we went to a big mall in a nearby city. it's fun to see little cultural differences, like paying money to use the restroom and smoking indoors. so far, i think my three favorite things about germany are: 1)mary. 2)mary's great little church family. 3)people eat ice cream all the time.

Language and such...

[Disclaimer: sorry if this entry comes across as snotty in any way... I simply find the the entire language phenomena and people's perceptions of my German rather interesting.]

While at the driving school today, I had two distinctly different styles of conversation, which was quite amusing.

Normally, people speak to me, well, "normally." At work, for example, my co-workers don't slow things down for me because I'm the Office American. I simply have to work a little harder than the others to understand everything. When Sydney told Bizarro Mom once that she should slow it down and speak Hochdeutsch* with me instead of Schwäbisch**, she said that she considered me a part of everyone else - no special treatment, that is. And that made me very happy (though I always appreciate Syd's help and clarifications! I can be rather lost at times.).

All that to say, though people know I'm American, and though I sometimes (often? usually? always? no!) don't follow everything, people tend to speak normally to me.

Today was a different story.

One of the guys at the driving school was seriously a German Al Gore communication-style-wise. He. E-nun-ci-a-ted. Each. Syl-la-ble. And. He. Spoke. Down. To. Me. Like. I. Had. Comprehension Issues. Which I do... but please! Not to that extent! And he kept repeating the simplest of things, as if I didn't understand.

Interestingly, about fifteen minutes before speaking with him, I'd had a conversation with a different man. Not only did this man speak rather quickly, but he had a slight accent, which made it even more difficult to follow.

After talking on and off as I was filling out practice tests, we had the following conversation (in German, of course)...

Man: "So, you got your license in the States?"
Mary: "Yes, in Texas. Unfortunately, it's not valid here..."
Man: "That's right... only licenses from certain states are recognized."
Mary: "And of course Texas isn't in the list."
Man: "How long were you in the States? Did you enjoy it there?"
Mary: "Um, I used to live there. I'm American."
Man: "Oh, I thought you had studied there."

He then told me that he thought I was German, had gotten my license while studying in the States, and had to re-do it here. He said he noticed that my German was a little "off", but thought it was due to an extended stay in the States.

*tee hee*

This isn't the first time for such an occurence, and it honestly confuses me. After much research and analysis, I've concluded that here could be several reasons for such occurences...

1. People are hard-of-hearing or don't listen and thus think my German is better than it actually is.

Person: "Your German's amazing!"
Mary: "It's cause you won't let me get a word in edge-wise."
Person: "No, seriously, your German is great."
Mary: "Yeah, all I've done in the past two hours is nod my head and say either 'yes' or 'no'. If I'd actually speak, you'd witness the horrors."

2. I often carry the same surface-y conversations with people I've just met, so I know what to say, have said it before, and thus come across fairly fluent and, well, German.

3. Having lived here as a child gives me a huge language advantage, and I have less of an accent than most Americans. People can tell I'm a foreigner, but they rarely nail me as American. The only person here who immediately knew I was American was a British sales clerk at the local hardware shop. Thus far, no German has been able to tell.

4. It seems that people rate your language-speaking-abilities based more on how you sound as opposed to content. Co-workers, for example, have told me that my German is better than that of other American colleagues. This is far from the truth. I've spoken German with other American colleagues, and their vocabulary is miles (kilometers!) beyond mine. Sure, I have less of an accent, but I can't express myself or carry on a conversation to the extent that they can. But in the eyes of my German co-workers, my German is better because I "sound" better. Strange stuff.

Anyway. One of my goals is for German to be second nature. I don't want people to be able to tell that I'm not a German... eh, maybe in several years. :)


* "high German", or the standard German

** a language spoken by people in southern Germany. They can do everything but speak Hochdeutsch. Bizarro and Helmut would fall into this category.


Katinka-dabogana Countdown: approximately 8 hours and 7 minutes! SCREEE!!!

Sisters, sisters!

Less than two days until my chica is here!

In honor of her pending arrival, a song from the movie White Christmas. Why, you might ask, a Christmas song in May? Because it feels like Christmas Eve!

Sisters, sisters,
There were never such devoted sisters.

Never had to have a chaperon, No Sir!
I'm there to keep my eye on her!

Caring, sharing
Every little thing that we are wearing.

All kinds of weather,
We stick together.
The same in the rain or sun.
Two different faces,
But in tight places,
We think and act as one.

Those who've seen us
Know that not a thing could come between us.

Many men have tried to split us up, but no one can.
Lord, help the mister
Who comes between me and my sister.
And Lord help the sister
Who comes between me and my man.


Thanks to Irving Berlin!


Katinkana-dabogana Countdown: approximately 1 day, 12 hours, 24 minutes!

Motorcross! (should the next project be a Motorcycle License?)

Went to a dirt-bike race last Monday with several kids (and Eleanor's bass-guitar-playing hubby) from church. It's strange... it seems like most of my time is spent with people who are either older or younger. Or with families. Though today after church, I actually hung out with a group of people my own age (that's a story for another entry!).

Anyway.

Motorcross pictures!



The girl with the blue jacket looking at the camera is Eleanor's daugher. The little girl next to her is Bizarro's niece who kept asking me annoying questions the other day. The girl with the goofy grin in the light blue jacket is Bizarro's daughter. To the far right is Sydney.






Here, you can see see where the bikers are getting ready for the start...










In one race, the bikers drove these two-person bikes. One person drove (of course) and the other shifted his weight around accordingly.









And another...











Then, the Michelin Tire Man. I'd even argue that he's cuter than the Pilsbury Dough Boy.











It was drizzling that day, which meant messy, slippery mud instead of dusty dirt. The funniest part was when we made our way down this slick, muddy hill to stand right on the sidelines. Every time the bikers drove by, dirt and mud would come flying in our direction. Sure, my clothes were trashed, it was loud*, and I had clumps of mud in my hair, but it was totally worth it.

Every now and then it's ok to make mudpies in the slums, isn't it?

During Intermission, Josh Groban's "You Raise Me Up" was played over the loudspeakers. For some strange reason, it didn't seem to fit. But it was nice to hear nonetheless.


*so loud, in fact, that certain people stuck tissue pieces in their ears... tissue pieces which unfortunately became stuck and had to be later removed with tweezers. Aka Pinzetten.


Lyric of the day: "Go, Greased Lightning, you're burnin' up the quarter mile.... Greased Lightning! Go Greased Lightning!" (thanks to the Grease Musical!)


Katinka-dabogana Countdown: approximately 2 days, 12 hours and 31 minutes. I feel like a little kid on Christmas Eve!!!

Study Break and Multiple-Choice Quiz!

Fortunately I have no paper-shredder, otherwise these horrible driver's license practice tests would be long gone.

Seriously, though: any free time I have is spent trying to stay afloat in an undertow-laden whirpool of multiple choice questions... as multiple choice questions have taken over my life, I thought it'd be nice to have an entry to reflect this inevitable (but thank goodness temporary) thorn in my side.

1. What are you doing right now?
(a) studying for your driver's license test
(b) drinking hot chocolate made with real cocoa
(c) playing with your nosering
(d) fighting a losing battle against distraction and apathy
(d) all of the above

2. What do you wish you were doing?
(a) picking your sister up from the airport
(b) time-traveling back to the 60's and and hanging out with the boys on Abbey Road
(c) playing the piano
(d) floating around Italy with your dearest friend
(e) all of the above

3. Where are you now?
(a) in a field of celophane flowers of yellow and green
(b) home (wherever that might be)
(c) amidst tangerine trees and marmalade skies
(d) in the back of a newspaper taxi with your head in the clouds
(e) down on a bridge by a fountain

4. What's the purpose of life?
(a) nothing... it's all meaningless, and a chasing after the wind
(b) self indulgence in every art and form
(c) to pass your driver's license test
(d) to know God and make Him known
(e) um, this is getting too philosophical for me

5. Has Mary officially gone insane?
(a) yes
(b) no
(c) maybe
(d) who cares?
(e) all of the above

Ok, back to studying... *sigh*


Lyrics of the day: "Lucy in the sky with diamonds... Lucy in the sky with diamonds..." (Thanks to the Beatles!)


Katinka-dabogana Countdown: approximately 5 days, 10 hours and 39 minutes.

Please Pass the Salt, Part II

This morning, I received a frantic phone call from my boss' secretary requiring me to immediately drop everything and take on another super-crucial emergency translation project.

Secretary: "Mary, I need your help! They've changed the menu this morning!"
Mary: "Oh no! All my work... down the drain..."
Secretary: "Instead of Blattspinat*, they're offering Blumenkohl!"
Mary: "Augh!!!"

Ok... I know what "Kohl" is (cabbage), and I know what "Blumen" are (flowers)... but put them together, and Houston, we have a Translation Crisis. Fortunately, Leo happened to be sitting right by me at my desk.

Mary: *taps Leo on the shoulder* "Hey Leo, what's Blumenkohl?"
Leo: "Cauliflower."
Mary: "Aha. Thanks."
Leo: "Sure, anytime. Your German is pathetic, by the way."
Mary: "Shut up."

I'd be willing to bet that the CEO doesn't even know what cauliflower is.


*spinach


Lyric of the day: "If I had a million dollars, we wouldn't have to eat Kraft Dinner... but we would eat Kraft Dinner.... of course we would, we'd just eat more..." (Thanks to the Ladies!)


Katinka-dabogana Countdown: approximately 7 days, 8 hours and 4 minutes.

Oh, horrifying, endless horrors without end!!!

This weekend, I learned an interesting German saying from Bizarro Mom's husband aka Sydney's Dad aka The One For Whom I Need A Name, But Am Unable To Come Up With Anything Creative.

Here goes:

(to my dear German readers - feel free to correct me if I'm off)

"Besser ein Ende mit Schrecken als ein Schrecken ohne Ende."

It's perfect.

"Better an end with horror than a horror without an end."

Or...

"Better a horrifying end than an endless horror."

Sure, horrible ends are, well, horrible. But sometimes that's the only option. And no one wants to live with a life-long horror.


Katinka-dabogana Countdown: approximately 9 days, 11 hours and 48 minutes.

Driver's License Test Questions

Q: Bis zu welcher Höhe darf die Ladung nicht nach vorn über das Fahrzeug hinausragen?
(Until which height is allowed the cargo not over the front of the car to stick out?)
A: 2,5 m. Yeah? And what if it sticks out 2,500008 m.? Do I get another PUNKT?

Q: Was kann bei einem Kraftfahrzeug zum Qualmen des Dieselmotors führen?
(What can on a vehicle to smoke of the Diesel motor lead?)
A: I DON'T CARE!!!

Q: Warum muss die Bremsflüssigkeit nach Anweisung des Fahrzeugherstellers ausgetauscht werden?
(Why must the break fluid according to instructions of the auto manufacturer changed be?)
A: I wouldn't even know the answer to this question if it were in English!!!

Q: Die Scheibenwischer an Ihrem Pkw funktionieren nicht. Was kann die Ursache dafür sein?
(The windshield wipers on your [formal] car function not. What can the cause there for be?)
A: Who gives a *bleep*???

Q: Bei welchen Drogen kann schon einmaliger Konsum zu vorübergehender Fahruntüchtigkeit führen?
(By which drugs can already one-time consumption to temporary driving inability lead?)
A: I got a fever, and the only prescription is more hookah!


Lyric of the day: "Baby, you can drive my car... and yes, I'm gonna be a star. Baby, you can drive my car, and maybe I'll love you. Beep beep, mmm, beep beep, yeah." (Thanks to the Beatles!)


Katinka-dabogana Countdown: Approximately 10 days, 18 hours, 51 minutes.

Super-Critical Translation Project (please pass the salt)

Being the sophisticated English-speaking international business woman that I am, I often receive critical translation projects, and today was no exception. The project? Translating next Tuesday's cafeteria menu into English because the BenQ CEO from Taiwan is coming to Kamp-Lintfort that day. *gulp*

As if I have nothing better to do than sit at my desk and try to figure out whether "gebratene Puten" means "roasted turkey hen" or "fried turkey hen." And believe me, there's a difference. What if the CEO doesn't eat fried stuff? What if he orders "roasted turkey hen" cause that's what's on the menu, and then has a heart-attack cause it's fried? Is it my fault? Will I lose my job?

Hmm... maybe I'll then receive a new Super-Critical Translation Project. Like translating directions to the nearest hospital into English.

I kind of wanted to mis-translate the menu or add random dishes and items just to throw things off and make things interesting, but decided not to.

CEO: "I ordered fetuccini alfredo with peppered chicken! What's this funky-looking piece of meat?"
Waitress: "Um, that's Curry Wurst. It's what you ordered."
CEO: "No, I didn't order that. Can't you read the menu?"
Waitress: "I am reading the menu!!"
CEO: "You're fired!"

My Boss: "Mary, we need to talk... please step into my office."
Mary: "Darn, I was afraid you'd say that..."

Heh.

My Emita, Part II

There was once a sweet las named Emita
Who sent her sister a postcard each week-a.
She was freakishly tall...
But then, aren't we all?
How dearly I love my lil' chica.

Limericks...

... cause writing in rhyme and making jokes out of semi-serious issues somehow makes things less stressful.

There was a young man from the Ruhr
Who was chatty and quirky galore.
At first it was fun,
'Til the stalking begun...
So girls tore for the nearby-est door.

There was a young gal from Neukirchen
Who appeared gentle, sweet, and quite classy,
Until pushed and annoyed
By a strange local boy...
Her behaviour's become rather nasty.

This gal has a dear friend in Texas
Who agrees all boys do is upset us.
So they vented and laugh-ed,
As a clear plan was draft-ed...
Escaping to Italy's a definite must.

Wraps = Salami Tacos?

Aww, I miss my Texas co-workers (well, most of them). :) Got an e-mail from Jen the other day describing a typical scenario in the dynamic HCBC Office life: Jen and Shelby having lunch together and laughing hysterically, people dropping by one another's offices to chat, and Kenny making goofy comments and observations.

Here's what Jen wrote me:

"I made roast beef wraps for lunch one day and brought one for Shelby to try. Now, these are very clearly in the category of a "wrap." It’s spinach, red pepper, and roast beef wrapped up in a tortilla. Pretty simple. And wraps are a pretty commonly known type of food stuff, right? I mean, everyone has wraps…Subway, KFC, Burger King, you name the place, they have a wrap. So, we’re sitting here eating the wraps and Kenny walks by and stops in and looks at them and says, "Oh! Salami Tacos!" Shelby and I just look at each other and die laughing thinking that he’s joking, but no, he’s not joking, "salami taco" is really the very first thing that popped in his head. We were like, "Um..how about a wrap?" He’s like, "Oh yeah, I guess you could call it that." Right, "salami taco" makes so much more sense, sorry to use such a misnomer as "wrap."*

The problem with Kenny is that he frequently says such absurd things, and you sometimes can't tell whether or not he's joking. He must have had tacos on the brain that day. See what daily dosages of Tobasco sauce and Guadalajara over the years can do to you...


*thanks to Jen for the contribution!


Lyric of the day, for old times sake, not because I'm into country music: "Cadallac, black jack, baby meet me out back, we're gonna boogie. Hey, get down, turn around, go to town - boot scootin' boogie." (Thanks to Brooks and Dunn!)

The Boy Update Post

Ah, boys. Whether or not I've found a German boy is a frequently asked question, so I thought I'd give an update (and maybe even stand on my little soapbox for a while - why the heck not?). Plus, I've felt a little pushed, challenged, and put on the defensive in this area lately.

Let's put it this way: the answer to 97.83% of the guy-questions is a resounding "no." And as far as I know, no one whom I'd be interested in is interested in me at the moment.

My goal for being here is not to find a man. Not to be presumptuous, but if I wanted to settle down with someone, I would have stayed in the States. I'm not in any way saying I had a ton of options in the States, or that I left a trail of broken hearts by moving here... what I am saying is this: had boys been my priority, I wouldn't have moved here.

The minute I open my mouth and say words like "Germany" or "overseas" or "missionary" to American boys where there's some degree of mutual interest, the results are identical: they go tearing for the nearest exit. Unrequitted love. Inevitable. I sometimes feel I had to choose, in a way, between two very different dreams and paths.

So, I weighed the options, made a decision, and am running with it.

What's the point? Let's be redundant for the sake of hammering home the point: I didn't move to Germany to chase or find guys. That's never been the goal or motivation, and never will be. Sure, it'd eventually be nice to find someone, but there are other things I need to first learn, experience, deal with and take care of.

So it is.

And so it will go.


*gazes up into sky and steps off the soapbox*


Lyric of the day: "...lend me some fresh air... show me the back door... please open the window..." (Thanks to Alanis).

Duzen vs. Siezen

German is a language with both formal and informal versions of "you." For all my Spanish-speaking or Spanish-learning friends in Texas, it's comparable to the "tu" vs. "usted."

In German, it's "du" informally and "Sie" formally.

Sometimes it's difficult knowing what to say to whom. As a general rule, when you meet someone your age or older, you use "Sie." Normally the older of the two will initiate the "duzen" - give the younger person permission, in a way, to make the transition from "du" to "Sie."

People in Germany are generally more formal than in the States... when you first meet someone, you always say "Herr or Frau So-and-So" (Mr./Ms./Mrs. So-and-So). At first I felt weird when people twice my age addressed me as "Frau Barber", but I've gotten used to it now. The other day, as a matter of fact, I was actually a little taken aback and felt like things were moving too fast when someone I'd just met called me "Mary" right off the bat.

There are currently duzen vs. siezen issues with one co-worker in particular, whom we'll call Michael Mustermann.* He's in a different department, so I don't have too much contact with him... but enough contact to where I think we should duz eachother. He's one of the higher-up bosses, and older (40?) so it's his decision whether or not we take that step.

Whenever I write him, I write "Herr Mustermann" in order to be respectful, but then sign "Mary", hoping he'll take the hint that he can call me by my first name. Which he never does.

The confusing thing about him is that he communicates a strange mixture of the two: he'll sometimes siez and sometimes duz. Instead of writing "Frau Barber" or "Mary", he always writes "Mary Barber." He signs his own e-mails "Michael Mustermann" as well (as opposed to "Herr Mustermann" or "Michael"). Mixed signals! Not fun!

Unfortunately, there seem to be no set rules on when to duz and when to siez. I thought that everything in Germany was "geregelt"... maybe I've found an exception! :)


*name slightly altered to protect privacy


Lyric of the day: "Why, why do I try to change you? Try to change you when you really don't want me to? Why, why do I try to love you? Try to love you when you really don't want me to?" (Thanks to Alanis!)

Happy Eastern!

In German, "Easter" is "Ostern" (not "Oster"). That is, it has an 'n' on the end. Volli sent me an Easter greeting in English and wrote "Happy Eastern", which I got a kick out of. :)

Anyway.

Easter this year was crazy! 'Twas my first Easter away from my family... but the whole week was so busy, and there was so much going on, that I didn't even have time to feel homesick.

Here are the high-lights, in chronological order...

1. finishing our forecast in world-record timing, and taking off early from work on Thursday!

2. singing in the hospital on Thursday... I managed to sing Alto, which was interesting.

3. listening to the kids who'd been through a Bible Class give their testimonies and talks on various spiritual topics during the Good Friday service.

4. chickening out during the Good Friday service and singing Soprano instead of Alto at the last minute... it takes major concentration and practice to sing against other voices, especially when you're the only one and you have no experience. Bleh.

5. Bizarro Mom's Herrencreme - rum pudding with chocolate chunks and raisins. Mmm...

6. playing a card game similar to Nertz with the kids.

7. talking with my Mamita on the phone.

8. having both Monday and Friday off.

9. being a completely lazy bum on Saturday... lounging around in my pajamas, reading, writing, and drinking hot chocolate most of the day.

10. being at the right place at the right time. Saturday evening, as I was playing the piano at church, the lights suddenly went out and I heard someone saying "Hallo?" from the other room. Bizarro Mom's husband (I need a name for him, but I can't come up with a decent one!) was there, and one of the hoses had burst as he was filling the baptismal with water. So, I was able to help repair it.

11. watching several kiddos be baptized during the Easter Service! :)

12. having the job of handing the kiddos towels as they left the baptismal/stage.

13. singing "Vater, unser Vater" during the Easter Service.

14. having "aha!" moments and realizations.

15. going out to lunch with Bizarro and the family after church... they had relatives from all over the map come visit, and everyone was surprisingly normal. :)

16. riding in an Audi TT.

17. learning from Sydney how to drive stick-shift on the tractor.

18. seeing an Easter Bonfire.

19. testing how fast the tractor will go with Sydney... we made it to 21.6 km/h. And it was all legal, of course.


Lyric of the day: "Deine Herrschaft soll kommen. Das, was du willst, geschehen. Auf der Erde, im Himmel sollen alle es sehen. Vater, unser Vater, alle Ehre Deinem Namen. Vater, unser Vater, bis ans Ende der Zeiten. Amen."

Am Not.

Creatures can't be creature-comforts;
A Fury oughtn't be idolized.
The only angels are in Heaven;
An imbecile is all but wise.

Convalescents are not healers-
They belong not on a pedestal.
Gaping, barren voids are common,
But made not by Another whole.

This tiny halo sits quite crooked;
Faults infest and are innate.
Adjustment is a daily feat-
Be wary whom you emulate.

Blog Updates and Reconstrution

Updates are as follows...

There's now a list of the primary blog characters. The purpose here is twofold: to introduce characters to the new reader, and to help the current reader avoid any character confusion.

There's also a FAQ (frequently asked questions) section. If I've left anything out, let me know.

The links to these two sections will appear at the bottom of every blog entry, as well as in the sidebar.

I've moved any writing having to do with music to a new page, Majors and Minors. This way, you won't have to be bored or annoyed with my Constantine ramblings (he quit his band, by the way, and is going solo!). When this page is updated, I'll post a note/link for anyone who's interested.

Ah, spring cleaning. Unfortunately my spring cleaning is limited to my blog and my harddrive. I'm still accepting applications for a personal assistant.


Lyric of the day: "I predict a riot! I predict a riot!" (Thanks to the Kaiser Chiefs)

Children!

No matter what country you're in, children remain the same bizarre little creatures. Today, a couple of German kids asked me the same types of questions that American kids (and a Swiss kid on a flight from Dallas to Zuerich) have asked me.

Kid: "Do you have a sister?"
Mary: "Yes, I have three, actually..."
Kid: "Where do they live?"
Mary: "They live in America... very far away from here."
Kid: "Does that mean you can speak American?"
Mary: "I am American... and yes, I sometimes speak English."

Is my German really that good? No. Does the kid think I'm a German? I think not. Then again, Americans aren't the only foreigners here in Germany. Maybe she thought I was from Tahiti or Myanmar.

Then the questions as they dropped me off...

Kid: "Is that where you live?"
*points to my appartment complex*
Mary: "Yup, that's where I live."
Kid: "Is that where your mommy lives?"
Mary: "No... my mommy lives across the Atlantic Ocean. She kicked me out of the house because I misbehaved and picked my nose instead of eating my vegetables." *sniff sniff*

Actually, I didn't say that. :)

And another...

Kid: "Do you like Mr. X.?"
Mary: "Um, no."
Kid: "Oh. Well, then do you have a husband?"
Mary: "No."
*hopes that blunt un-expounded answers will bore the child enough to change the topic*
Kid: "Oh. Well, do you have a boyfriend?"
Mary: "No."
Kid: "Oh. How old are you?"
Mary: "Thanks for boosting my self-esteem, kid."

Actually, it was rather amusing and my self-esteem was in no way affected.


Quote of the Day: "Happy Eastern!" (Thanks to Volli)

And the Biomuell Saga continues...

There a new twist in the Biomuell Saga!

[aside: yes, it's pathetic... another entry devoted to Biomuell. It's just that the whole phenomenon and disposal process is so darn fascinating.]

At church last weekend, a friend, Beatrice*, said she had a gift for me. In a Mary-Poppins-like-style, she reached into her purse, and lo and behold: trashbags! But not just any trashbags... trashbags made especially for Biomuell!



Trashbags are better than the little tupper-ware containers I've been using for various reasons:

1. they contain less air, which will hopefully result in a quick and painless Biomuell-suffocation and thus the inability to escape and kill me in my sleep.

2. un-aesthetic environment (as opposed to the clear tupper-ware containers allowing a nice view of my appartment), which will hopefully result in Biomuell boredom and eventual desperation.

3. the trashbags themselves are biodegradable, which means I can simply throw them away. Of course, they don't last as long as "normal" trashbags... but that's the only precaution.



Thank you Beatrice! How can I ever repay you and thank you? Reeses Peanut Butter Cups, perhaps? :)

Though I joke about Biomuell, it really is distressing when I take it out every week... it's like parting with a dear pet, in a way.


*name changed to protect privacy


Formula of the day: "=WENN(ISTFEHLER(SVERWEIS($B18;'UMTS (29548)'!
$B:$T;E$106;0));;SVERWEIS($B18;'UMTS (29548)'!$B:$T;E$106;0))" (Thanks to a Bocholt colleague who explained sverweis to me)

Thoughts on prayer, trust, life, etc.

This evening during Bible Study, we read the final several verses of James and discussed prayer and how God answers. As a semi-practical person who likes results and clear answers, it's often difficult for me to pray and wait for God to answer. I'd like to hear a voice or receive an e-mail. I'd like to look up and see words and directions scrolling in the night sky like in Star Wars, but that's unfortunately not an option. Which means, in order to be obedient, I'm to pray, trust and wait.

These seem to be recurring themes and thoughts lately.

On Monday night I spoke with Esther*, one of my dearest friends (and roommate for two years!) and we had a similar conversation... we ended up talking about prayer, faith, decision-making and uncertainties - both in the present and in the future. It's often difficult to believe, trust and hope as you're in the moment, in the present... but looking in retrospect almost always gives a new perspective and clarity.

Our Monday conversation ties in with tonight's conversation - God answers prayers. That's certain. Here's the clincher, though: He answers according to His will, and in His timing. Which are all too often different than my own will and timing.

In the past couple of weeks, I've really begun to see and understand God's guidance and direction in my life since last summer. Many things didn't run as I'd originally planned and desired... but everything's truly turned out for the best.

For example, I had my heart set on Berlin over the past two years. Not only do we have family friends there who pastor a little church, but the city itself is amazing - it's a cultural melting pot, and the perfect mixture of history and modernity. It was frustrating when I couldn't get a job there... but after weighing the options, I decided that even a little tiny town in Germany (Kamp-Lintfort) would be better than being in the States (no offense to anyone there - I was just ready for an adventure/challenge/change). I told Esther the other night that though I miss her and everyone back home tremendously, I really do think I'm in the right place, and at this point I can't imagine being anywhere else in the world.**

Then there was the appartment issue. Everyone I'd talked to recommended I find a place in Moers - the "largest" city near Kamp-Lintfort, where I work. Every appartment visit either fell through or wasn't right, for some reason. It was a frustrating time - I'd been praying for an appartment; everyone back home was also praying; and it was a definite need. Why was everything falling through? The hotel was nice, but enough is enough.

Now, I cringe thinking that I'd almost signed a lease in Moers. It's perfect here in Neukirchen for several key reasons: (1) Bizarro Mom is my renter, (2) I'm within a 3-minute walking distance to the church- and to a piano! (3) it's easy for people to come by, as it's so close to church, (4) NK is closer to work and (5) NK is really growing on me.

There are many things in life that we don't understand until post-facto, sometimes even years later. Then there are certain situations and occurrences I wonder if I'll ever understand.

Maybe so, maybe not.

When I was going through a hard time with faith and such at one point, my dad told me something I've always remembered. He said that though it's good to question and think and study, I'm never going to understand everything. If I were to understand everything, then I'd be God. This is completely absurd, and thus makes an excellent point.

Which brings us back to the beginning... trusting and knowing that God answers, and accepting the fact that His will and timing might just be different than your own. Ah!


Lyric of the day: "Can you catch the wind? See a breeze? It's presence is revealed by the leaves on a tree. An image of my faith in the Unseen." (Thanks to dcTalk).


*name unchanged

**excluding a little mud hut in Fiji...

And we're back...

Sorry about any confusion or inconvenience.

I even confuse myself at times. ;)


Lyric of the day: "Visiting hours are 9 to 5 and if I show up at ten past 6, well, I already know that you'll find some way to sneak me in..." (Thanks to Alanis.)

I dare you to psychoanalyze this mess...

I really do like my job and my co-workers... but lately work has been haunting my private life.

One of my co-workers, commonly referred to as "The Commander" because of his experience and job description is particularly threatening. He's the one I give the majority of my reports and forecasts to, so there's a natural pressure and stress I feel every time he looks in my direction or meanders towards my desk.

Bizarro Mom lent me a crime novel several months ago, and I've been plugging away at it when I have extra time. In one scene, the lady is home alone and someone breaks in... it's not the type of thing you can read at night when you're alone with the Biomuell, if you know what I mean.

Then there was the episode where my electrical box had somehow opened and I was spooked that an intruder was in my apartment.

So... what's the point of these three blurbs which are seemingly unrelated?

Well, everything came together the other morning, in a twisted Seinfeldian fashion when I woke up in a cold sweat thinking I'd lost my sanity (the onset of many mental illnesses is mid to late twenties... hmm...).

I had a dream. A dream where I was alone in my apartment and thought I heard someone... as I turned the corner, The Commander (who had apparently broken into my apartment and was waiting for me) grabbed me and put me in a head-lock, demanding that I turn in my forecast and NCC report. I struggled to break free, and to breathe, but to no avail.

When I saw him at work the next morning, I didn't know whether I should laugh or flee for my life. So I took the normal, socially appropriate route: suppress any emotion or desire and proceed as if nothing had occured.

Life. *tsk tsk*


Lyrics of the day: "Visiting hours are 9 - 5 and if I show up at ten past 6, well, I already know that you'll find some way to sneak me in and oh... mind the empty bottle with the holes along the bottom, you see, it's too much to ask for and I am not the doctor." (Thanks to Alanis.)

Wait... what?

I have felt like a complete idiot these past few days. At work, a co-worker and I have a translation project (translate: Mary has a translation project 'cause she's the one who speaks semi-fluent English), and it's kicking my rear!

By early afternoon each day, I inevitably have a throbbing headache, a stiff neck, dried-out contact lenses, and the desire to throw myself out of my (rather high) office window. Is it possible to develop a brain cramp due to over-exertion of mental energy?

Here are some problems with German sentences I must face on a daily basis:

- too long

- overly complicated

- confusing cases (dative, accusative, genitive, etc.)

- horrid case overlap ("der", for example, can be either masculine nominative singular, feminine dative singular, feminine genetive singular, or masculine/feminine genetive plural).

- unknown words

I've been here about six months... you'd think translating a simple guideline packet wouldn't be such an issue. Oh, but it is.

The strange thing is that when I read it in German, I understand what's being said and what the general concepts are. Sure, there are words I don't know, but that doesn't mean I don't understand the context and general idea. Translating, however, is a completely different story. Why is it so difficult? Maybe because I think in concepts instead of words, or am not used to directly translating German into English in my mind... who knows.

And the quarter-glass (that's all I could down without feeling tipsy! Pathetic!) of champagne to celebrate a co-worker's graduation, drunk after missing my afternoon lunch break, isn't helping the situation.

I've got a fever... and the only prescription is more cowbell!

Lucida Sans

After quite a bit of searching, discussing and debating, we finally decided on a font for the church letter-head and banner: Lucida Sans. 'Twas a glorious occasion.


I will get up now and surf about the internet,
through its search engines and annoying pop-up ads.
I will search for the font my heart loves...

Scarcely had I passed when I found Lucida Sans, the one my heart loves.
I downloaded her and would not let her go to my Recycle Bin...
How beautiful you are, my darling Lucida Sans! Oh, how beautiful!

My Lucida Sans in the clefts of cyberspace,
in the hiding places in a myriad of Schrott-font-sites,
let me hear your voice, show me your letters,
for your letters are sweet, sans serif, and slightly italicized....

My font is mine and I am hers; she browses among Powerpoint documents.
Until the day breaks and the shadows flee,
turn, my Lucida Sans, and be like a winzip file,
or like a .ttf file on my rugged (and clogged up) harddrive.

My Lucida Sans is radiant and ruddy,
oustanding among ten thousand fonts.

All beautiful you are, my darling Lucida Sans,
far beyond Petite Medium, Arial and Times New Roman.
There is no type flaw in you.

:)


(Inspired by various bits and pieces of Song of Solomon, especially 3:2-4, 4:1-7, 2:14-17, 5:10.)

Leave my American English alone!

Having people correct my German is a normal, expected, every-day occurence. It's when people start correcting and making fun of my English that I become slightly concerned.

Coworker 1: "You don't have a television??"
Mary: "No, but I have internet and flat-rate, which can be just as dangerous."
Coworker 1: "Haha, you pronounced flat-rate wrong."
Coworker 2: "Yeah, she did: flaaaaaat ray-eeete."

Both then proceeded to laugh and mock my twangy American English.

Pardon? Last time I checked, English was my native tongue. I think I know how to pronounce common English words.

Coworker 2: "So you're saying everyone in Germany but you pronouces it incorrectly?"
Mary: "Ummm..."

A linguistic prof once stressed the fact that language is fluid and evolving, and thus relative. The key is that people understand one another. If a word is pronounced a certain way, and people understand it, then that's the right way. She even argued that there's no "right" way to spell. Please. We all know that without Webster, society and language as we know it would crumble.

It's interesting - many English words have seeped into every-day German... but they're often mispronounced and used in a different context. Americans do the same with certain Germans words that have found their way into the English vocabulary. "Krank" and "Angst" are classic examples.

Oh well. As long as we understand eachother, it's all good, right?


Formula of the day:
"=WENN((RECHTS(WENN(RECHTS(LINKS(B5;6);1)="/";LINKS(B5;5);WENN
(RECHTS(LINKS(B5;4);1)="/";LINKS(B5;3);LINKS(B5;4)));1)="V");LINKS
(WENN(RECHTS(LINKS(B5;6);1)="/";LINKS(B5;5);WENN(RECHTS(LINKS(B5;4)
;1)="/";LINKS(B5;3);LINKS(B5;4)));LÄNGE(WENN(RECHTS(LINKS(B5;6);1)
="/";LINKS(B5;5);WENN(RECHTS(LINKS(B5;4);1)="/";LINKS(B5;3);LINKS
(B5;4))))-1);WENN(RECHTS(LINKS(B5;6);1)="/";LINKS(B5;5);WENN(RECHTS
(LINKS(B5;4);1)="/";LINKS(B5;3);LINKS(B5;4))))"
(Thanks to quiet afternoons and cappuccino)

My Emita

Just got off the phone with my sis... 'twas a lovely hour and a half. She cracks me up. :)

Emita: "One reason I want to switch to a liberal arts major is so that I can do a study abroad and have an excuse to come visit you."
Mary: "You have got to come visit me! That would be awesome!"
Emita: "Except that I'm broke..."
Mary: "I'll totally help you with the ticket... sure, I might be broke as well... but at least we'll see eachother and be broke together."

Life and its unforseen consequences are so strange. You chase after one dream, only to leave others behind. It's inevitable; you cannot have it all; there's no such thing as a perfect life (actually, there might be, depending definitions and personal philosophy, but that's a topic for another day). In life, you have to make decisions*, and run with them. Being here in Germany has always been a goal and dream of mine... which means I've had to temporarily give up the dream of living in a van down by the river and smoking hookah all day with my chicas.

*sigh*

Emita: "Hey, I have to go... gotta get ready for class."
Mary: "Ok... I love you!! I miss you!"
Emita: "I love you too!"
Mary: "Have a nice rest of the day!"
Emita: "Have a nice life..."

Have a nice life?? What is that supposed to mean?

Emita: "I was totally kidding! You know I'm kidding!"
Mary: "You're going to make me cry!!"

The guilt! The guilt! I'm drowning in it! It's eating me alive (like the Biomuell)! It's suffocating me! *gasps*


Lyric of the day: "Sun lights up my daytime; moon lights up my night. My eyes light up when you call my name 'cause I know you're gonna treat me right... you give me fever." (Thanks to Eddie Cooley and John Davenport)


*including decisions that are slightly less life-altering and life-threatening such as whether to use the Abadi MT Condensed Light font, the Normographe Tryout font, or the Tempus Sans ITC font. Naja. Wird sich hoffentlich Samstag erledigen. Heh.

Eierlegende... what???

Thanks to Eleanor, who always so kindly and patiently corrects my German, a grave semantic mistake has been brought to my attention. In the Hohegrete entry, I described a new word: "Eierlegendevollmilchsau." The correct word is actually "Eierlegendewollmilchsau." Is there really that drastic of a semantic difference when replacing a 'v' with a 'w', you might ask. Yes, indeed, there is.

voll = full, complete, totally

die Vollmilch = whole milk

die Wolle = wool

die Wollmilch = wool milk (nonsense word)

[aside: a German 'v' is pronounced as an English 'f'. A German 'w' is pronounced as an English 'v'.]

I originally understood and translated the word as an "egg-laying, whole-milk-producing pig" when it should have been an "egg-laying, wool-and-milk-producing pig." The talents and abilities of this creature were obviously underestimated, as was the creative power of the German language, and I thus offer my deepest condolences.

The moral of the story? If someone is butchering your language, let them know (thanks, Eleanor!). It'll only help them improve.


Lyric of the day: "All I hear is radio ga-ga, radio goo-goo, radio ga-ga." (Thanks to Queen!)

Worlds Colliding!

My Mamita wrote a letter to Bizarro Mom! Ka-ray-zee-ness!


I read it the other day, and it was so strange. Well, the letter itself wasn't strange; it's the situation that slightly freaked me out.

At times I feel like George on Seinfeld (*waves to Shelby*)... he had two or three "worlds", and in each world, he was a slightly different "George." These worlds were in no way allowed to cross orbits.

Everyone has their various worlds (think: home, work, school, church, friends, etc.)... and though it can be strange and uncomfortable at times when the orbits intersect, it's actually a good thing. In most cases, I'd even argue that it should be the goal.

I currently have four primary worlds, each containing a different "personality", if you will:

1. Siemens-BenQ Controller Persona: her focus is her work responsibilities, which she takes very seriously... and she's often perceived as rather shy and reserved.

2. General German Persona: this is the post-work personality... she's done things at times that the majority of her American friends and acquaintances wouldn't approve of. We'll just leave it at that. ;)

3. Austin Persona: this is the let-it-all-hang-out-all-encompassing-semi-wild side. They've seen the peaks and valleys, the beauty and ugliness, the elation and depression, and everything in between.

4. Christus-Gemeinde Persona: this personality difficult to explain, as she's kind of a mixture of worlds, and is still developing.

It's important that worlds somehow revolve together, and even collide. Say no to fragmentation, and yes to integration. For example, I'd love for those in Austin to meet everyone here, and everyone here to meet those in Austin. And I'd love for my BenQ friends to meet not only my Christus-Gemeinde friends, but maybe even the God of the Universe.

World Collision? BRING IT ON!


Quote of the day: "Worlds are colliding! George is getting very upset!!!.... A George divided against itself cannot stand!" - George Costanza on Seinfeld

Deutschland vs. USA: 5-1

Last Wednesday, I went to the Deutschland vs. USA soccer game in Dortmund with three of my favourite colleagues. Sports, whether it be playing or watching, has never been my thing, but this was a total blast nonetheless! One colleague in particular is a soccer-fanatic... so, it was nice to get a glimpse into his world.



Here we are... can you tell who the soccer fanatic is? Yup, Teddy*, the one draped in the German flag on the right. Volli* is on the left and Eve* is in the middle. :)


It was hilarious watching the fans... there were certain songs and cheers that the entire stadium knew and sung together... reminded me of good ol' Aggieland.

The game itself wasn't that interesting... no points were scored in the entire first half. All I wanted was one real goal from the US... sure, they scored a goal, but the ball just kind of accidently rolled into the net, as the Germans thought it was a foul. *yawn*



Here we are during half-time (the score was 0-0 at this point).



There were 64,500 people in the stadium, with a very small percentage being American. One group of Americans was particularly rowdy and amusing, so I took a picture, which unfortunately didn't turn out that well. But you can still see a faint outline of our lovely flag.


One of the funniest parts of the evening was standing in line trying to get into the stadium... talk about personal space bubbles being infringed upon!! I felt like I was back in China, in line for an ice cream at McDonalds. Now, that is fighting and pushing. The people were so anxious to get into the stadium that I was literally being shoved and pushed forward and couldn't do anything about it. People in the crowd even started screaming and cursing at security. One smart-alec kept screaming things about President Bush.** Another started blaming the Americans for the long lines. I just kept my mouth shut. 'Twas amusing.



Once we actually made it into the stadium, this is what it looked like.


Another interesting tidbit... everytime the Germans scored a goal, a song was blasted over the stadium loudspeakers... in English, of course! And after all the Bush-bashing and making fun of Americans. :) Gotta love it.



Here's a photo one of my coworkers sent me of Olli Kahn**, the half-man-half-animal-hit-in-the-head-with-a-soccerball-one-too-many-times German Goalie. Maybe he's the reason the US couldn't score.


I do have one regret, and that is missing the National Anthems. Though we were about 45 minutes early, we missed the Anthems because it took so long to get through security. Who would've thought that soccer game security is better than airline (especially American Airlines) security? What's the world coming to?

The entire experience was great, and I was surprised that I actually got into the game itself! It's a silly soccer game!! During certain points in the game, it was even a little nerve-wracking. For some strange reason, I really wanted the US to score.

At the game, I also learned a new word: Ami. It's short for "Amerikaner" (American). Hmmm. It's pronounced the way a British person would pronounce the word "army."


And one more picture of my dear co-workers... :)



*name changed or slightly altered to protect privacy
**name unchanged and privacy unprotected


Lyric I of the day: "...and the rockets' red glare, the bombs bursting in air gave proof through the night that our flag was still there. Oh, say, does that star-spangled banner yet wave... o'er the land of the free, and the home of the brave." (US National Anthem)

Lyric II of the day: "Einigkeit und Recht und Freiheit für das deutsche Vaterland. Danach laßt uns alle streben brüderlich mit Herz und Hand..." (German National Anthem)

Bad Cop! No Donut!

It finally happened. After about seven years of driving, I received my first speeding ticket. As I was driving home from the soocer game last night, I was stopped on a little road between Kamp-Lintfort and Neukirchen-Vluyn. Seriously, if weapons were legalized in Germany, the cops would have more important and exciting things to do than plot annoying little speed traps at midnight.

Congratulations, though, to the German police force for accomplishing in six months what the American police force couldn't manage to do in six years... and that is catch me. I was clocked going about 25 km/h over the speedlimit, which is going to cost me about *gasp* 70 Euros.

70 Euros is a rather hefty amount to pay for my carelessnes and idiocy... but when I break it down, it's really not that bad. I've been driving (and by "driving", I mean "speeding") for almost seven years now. So... that's about 10 Euros per year. Less than one Euro per month. Approximately .192307692 Euro Cents per week. Eh, I can afford that. And I can do math when Pythagoras isn't involved.

I also received a "Punkt", or a "point." In Germany, you receive points for certain traffic offenses... and when you have X amount of points, you lose your driver's license. Is it even possible to have Punkte when you don't have a valid German or EU license? Is it possible to lose a driver's license you don't even have? Yeah, I'm on the happy yellow-brick-road to success.

Things really could have been much worse, though... for example, had I been caught about a week ago, I wouldn't have even had my driver's license with me. It had to be translated and re-written, which means I drove without it for about three weeks. The cop could have started questioning me about the validity of my Texas license, which he didn't do. And, I could have been driving 40 km/h over the speedlimit as opposed to a mere 25 km/h. Life isn't fabulous, but it's still good.

Now, to balance out that nasty little fine, I'm going to have to go without any new CDs, books, or chocolate for the next several months.

*sigh*


Lyric of the day: "I fought the law and the law won..." (Thanks to an Unknown Artist)

Welcome to my humble abode, Part II: The Kitchen *contains photos*

Today feels like a Picture Day as opposed to a Word Day, so I think I'll post a few more pictures of my cozy little flat... this time, of the kitchen. To make a picture larger, simply click on it.


Here you're looking into the kitchen/living room area from the hall...





This is taken from the living room...





Here's a closer-up view... two very important changes have taken place since this picture, however. First, I have a ratty little pink rug from Texas by the sink... and second, my fridge now has several other postcards in addition to my Sgt. Pepper postcard on it. There's one from Kenny, from my Emita, and from Constantine. :)





Here you can see all the pots and pans and such that different ladies in the church have given me... and yes, I do actually use them sometimes!





And last but not least, the little "bar" that separates the kitchen from the living room. Very cute and quaint, hmm?




Lyric of the day: "I want to be in the light as You are in the light... I want to shine like the stars in the Heavens..." (Thanks to dcTalk)

I want to quit my job and start a band.

So who's with me?? :)

My Aunt Jane* toured for a while, so why can't I??

Last Sunday after church, we had our quarterly meeting and lunch together. It was honestly one of my favourite days thus far (even more fun that parasailing!), and it's because of the people. We discussed the general direction of the church, upcoming activities, responsibilities, and who's to clean which windows in the gymnasium.

Everyone here is so laid-back, comfortable and natural with one another... they're like one big family, and it's great. After lunch, everyone was just lounging around in the youth room in the back of the church. The adults were chatting; some of the kiddos were goofing off on the computer; others were playing soccer in the gymnasium; Sydney and Eleanor's son (who could easily be one of the Little Rascals) were playing the piano and guitar; and Bizarro Mom's husband was on the couch snoozing through it all. It was hilarious.

Ok, let's take a brief break and learn a new German word...

bequem - comfortable, easygoing, cozy

"sich bequem machen" - to make yourself at home

It's a nice word, with very warm and positive connotations.

Back to the music... I was completely mesmerized and transfixed by Sydney and the Little Rascal's improv abilities. They'd written out a chord and rhythm pattern, and were simply following it in circles. The Little Rascal plucked away at his guitar, providing the beat and the primary chords... and Sydney somehow managed to spontaneously create a melody (which was quite chaotic at times, but lovely nonetheless).

It was very jazzy (I even learned the jazz scale!), and the brilliant thing about jazz music is that even when you play the "wrong" notes, or notes outside of the scale, it sounds right. As long as you're generally within a certain schema or scale, it all somehow works out.

I've always been amazed by people who can improv... it definitely takes a special talent. Sure, I can read notes to a certain extent, but's it's so mechanical and dull compared to what others can do. I think I've been bitten by the green-eyed monster. ;)


*name unchanged and privacy unprotected


Lyric of the day: "There's lots and lots for us to see... lots and lots for us to do... if she is electric, can I be electric too?" (Thanks to Oasis)

Bridging the Gap (that is the Atlantic Ocean)...

Writing this blog is rather challenging at times - in a good, amusing way, of course. And I've always been one for a challenge... whether it be packing up and moving overseas, or trying to switch from soprano to alto in choir. :)

Back in the day (well, knapp five months ago), I simply wrote anything about anyone here in Germany, only expecting a select few Texans to read it. Then came The Turning Point: a certain curious technical (and musical!) genius discovered this page, and the rest is history.

Now, I have to keep two audiences in mind, in a way. And one of those audiences is frequently the topic of my writing, which makes things even more complicated (but you all know I love you and wouldn't have it any other way!).

The people here, especially everyone at church, have become a tremendously significant part of my life. Ergo... if I'm going to write about my life here and what's important to me, I'm going to have to include everyone else, despite the fact that several read this.

Last night during Bible Study, we went slightly off topic to discuss my lovely little blog project. The feedback was positive and encouraging, and everyone encouraged me to continue writing, even if the content is personal, about the church, or sometimes about other people. Bizarro Mom (she somehow finds her way into every other entry!) and Neal* (our local progressive rocker and flute player) both agreed that what I've written thus far isn't offensive; they live here; they know how Germany is. And it's interesting to have an outsider's perspective on life and culture.

In the past several months, my audience has obviously changed... which made me re-think the focus of my writing and my goals in writing.

My original goal was to share my German life with those in Texas... not everyone has the chance to live and be submersed abroad, and I hope my dear Texas readers can learn and live vicariously through my ramblings. Americans (I love you guys!) are notorious for not being that... how shall we phrase this?... "culturally aware" at times. One of my goals is to change that among my circle of friends and readers.

I'm very pleased and excited that two groups are now reading this, and I think it's important that each group is aware of the other. So...

Mary: "Texas Readers, allow me to introduce my new German Readers."
Texas Readers: "Whoa, they're not wearing Lederhosen or drinking beer... weird."
Mary: "And German Readers, let me introduce you to my dear Texas Readers."
German Readers: *proceed to shake hands and brush up on their English skills*

The new goal is to bridge the gap, in a way, between two different groups of people, two different cultures, two different ways of thinking. Deep, deep down we're all people with the same needs, desires and yearnings... but that doesn't mean there aren't some rather entertaining differences. There's really so much we can learn from one another.

So, my encouragement to anyone who reads this is the following: take advantage of the situation! If you have questions or comments about anything, or want to share any ideas, please do so. If you've had experience abroad and would like to share a thought or story, let me know and I'll publish it here. For example, Eleanor studied at a New Jersey high school and wrote a paper about her first 24 hours in the States. I wanted to publish here... but she's unfortunately unable to find it! (Keep looking, Eleanor!!) Ideally, this is to be a group project and learning experience. Ah, idealism. 'Twill be the end of me.

Over the past couple of weeks, several people have said that they tried to leave comments but were unable to. If you ever want to add anything to this page, please let me know! Send me an e-mail. Give me a phone call. Give me a note. Tell me in person. I'll add it as fast as you can say "Eierlegendewollschlagsahnesau."

The sporadic comments from Steph** are great - she's had overseas experience and can add insights such as which Trash Category hair-dryers fall into. Karen's** comments are also wonderfully encouraging - it's people like her that make me want to continue sharing and writing. I know my Texas Readers got a kick out of Helmut's** comments (yes, he's real, folks)... he was the first German who dared to surface and add something. Then there's Kenny*... always love to hear from him.

Writing has always been something I love... so, as long as life is interesting and provides me with decent material, I'll continue to write whether or not others join me. I just want to make it very clear that this is a good opportunity for all involved, and I don't want anything to hold anyone back from sharing ideas or asking questions.


*name changed to protect privacy

**name unchanged and privacy unprotected


Quote of the Day: "Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all one's lifetime." - Mark Twain

My Biomuell is going to kill me in my sleep.

First things first... definitions!

der Biomuell = biological waste

One thing I've always had a hard time dealing with is the fact that Germans separate their trash. In the States, all our trash goes into one trash can. Simple and sweet. Here, however, you're required (it's "geregelt", of course) to separate your garbage into multiple catagories, bins and bags*...

1. Altpapier - includes newspapers, magazines, paper, etc.

2. Verpackung - includes plastic-y things like joghurt containers, wrappers, etc.

3. Kartonsomething - includes papery things, and is somehow differentiated from Altpapier

4. Biomuell - includes anything biological such as plants, food, etc.

5. Glass - there are special bins down the street for glass...

5a. dark glass

5b. clear glass

5c. other glass (help me, Rhonda)

6. Restmuell - whatever doesn't fit into the above categories... an example would be tea lights, I think.

I can deal with categories 1, 2, 3, 5a-c, and 6. But Category 4 is really becoming an issue. I've never seen anything as disgusting as Biomuell in my life... though watching Sydney drink the remains of the liquid whipping cream yesterday came pretty close. And Bizarro Mom told him to! When I was younger, I wanted to drink those little McDonalds creamers (and would sometimes sneak them), but my mother wouldn't allow me to. Child deprivation. If I were in the States, I'd sue and retire early.

Anyway. Back to Biomuell.

It's sitting in a little clear container on my kitchen counter, waiting to be taken out, taunting me every time I walk by. Two apple cores from a couple of weeks ago are in there, and they're completely turquoise and disintigrated. There's even condensation inside the container... it's a sick little environment in there, and I have no choice but to deal with it.

But for some reason, I can't bring myself to open the container and throw it away. The more I procrastinate, the worse it becomes... and the worse it becomes, the more I procrastinate. It's a vicious-Biomuell-cycle, and I don't know how to break free from it.

Last night, as I was laying in bed trying to sleep, I thought I heard something in the kitchen... and I swear it was the Biomuell. Something evil is evolving inside that horrid little tupperware container, and it's terrifying. It's slowly fighting and eating its way out, and I'm afraid that when I least expect it, it's going to attack me.

I need help. Major help.


*to any German friends reading this, feel free to correct me if my categories are wrong. I'm still trying to figure all this garbage all out.


Quote of the day: "Biomuell ate my leg off in Augsburg... I have a wooden leg." - Kenny

Give me a P! Give me an R! Give me an O!

P-R-O-C-R-A-S-T-I-N-A-T-E!

Where's my cheerleader mother when I need her?

Instead of studying, I'm talking with my Vatti online... he just got in from mowing the lawn in the Texas heat... and I'm sitting here, watching it snow. He wanted to see some pictures, so here goes...

This is looking out the window from my living room... I love the huge window here... you can watch the sunset in the evenings. Today was especially beautiful, as the snow made everything brighter.



Here's a view from the balcony...



And another balcony view... I tried to include the plant in this one because (a) that way you can see that some of the snow is actually sticking and (b) this might be one of it's last days on earth.

Ok, back to studying. Leo's waiting for me.

Leo, my Dah-ling...

Over the past couple of days, I've been spending quite a bit of time with Leo... and I'm starting to view him as more than just a "friend." He's been here through the craziness of the past couple of weeks, and he's helped me tremendously with studying for my driving test. And most evenings when I come home, he's sitting either at my desk or at my kitchen table.

Leo has many admirable qualities... qualities I think are very important in a guy. Here are a few:

1. He doesn't play games with your mind, confuse you, manipulate you, or tell you lies.

2. He's a genius, and arguably has an entire dictionary memorized.

3. He's bilingual, and definitely has a way with words.

4. He's an excellent listener, though I wish he'd talk a little more.

Our entire relationship is very clearly defined; as a matter of fact, it's based on definitions. A favourite professor of mine introduced us when I was in college, as classes were becoming more complicated and he thought that Leo might be able to help me study and write papers. I'll never forget the first time we met (*sigh*)... I was working on German homework and asked him the definition of a word... and he knew it, of course. We hit it off right away, and sure enough, Leo has been faithfully by my side since then.

Like any relationship, we've had our ups and downs... sometimes he simply shuts down, disappears, or gives me error messages. But there's never been anything the two of us couldn't work through together.

Sorry, ladies, but Leo's taken! (And sorry, guys, I'm taken by Leo!)

:)


Lyric of the day: "Standing in the sunlight laughing, hiding behind a rainbow's wall... slipping and sliding all along the waterfall with you, my brown-eyed girl. You're my brown-eyed girl. Do you remember when we used to sing Sha la la la la la la la la la de da... " (Thanks to Van Morrison!)

One killer week down, one to go...

We. Made. It. Through. Another. Week.

*closes her eyes, takes a deep breath, and lets it slowly out*

Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone for your prayers, encouragement, support and positive thoughts this week.

Now, if I can also make it through next week without the Big Kahunas from Muenchen taking a special trip to Kamp-Lintfort to tar and feather me for jeopardizing the budget, then all will be well with the world.

In order to "celebrate" the fact that it's Friday, I'm going to spend a lovely evening at home with my friend Leo... studying for my driver's license test, reading and drinking cappuccino (complete with whipped cream!).


Lyric of the day: "It's been a hard day's night, and I've been working like a dog... it's been a hard day's night; I should be sleeping like a log..." (Thanks to the Beatles)

Katinka-dabogana-na-huh-na-huh is coming to Deutschland!!!

That's right, my little chica is coming to visit me in Germany! I just got an e-mail from her saying that she booked her flight! I'm ecstatic! :)




Muah!

Um. Hopefully the carrier isn't American Airlines...


Lyric of the day: "Limitless, undying love which shines around me like a million suns... it calls me on and on across the Universe..." (Thanks to the Beatles, as usual)

Beautiful, blurred circle around the moon...

After choir this evening, some of us noticed that there was a strange sort of faint, cloudy circle around the moon... it wasn't clearly defined, or clearly around the perimeter... but was simply an extensive, blurred, bluish (blaeulich - the German Word of the Day) ring of some substance. I'd never seen anything like it. It was fascinating.

I had the same feeling looking up tonight as I had when the Hale-Bopp comment passed over good ol' Austin, Texas several years back. Frightening. What goes on upstairs and the intricacies of it all is both uncontrollable, often unexplainable, and beyond what we can imagine.

There's something about the sky and the vastness of it, especially by night, that gives you perspective and puts you in your place. It makes even seemingly important things such as (*ahem*) 1.4 million Euro calculation mistakes seem trivial. There are bigger, more important things in life.

Now accepting applications...

Contrary to popular belief, this entry is not a joke.

These past couple of days have proven that I'm in dire need of a secretary or personal assistant. If you or someone like you needs a job and is interested in the position (sorry, it's unpaid), please send me your resume', a brief description of why you are qualified for the job, and chocolate in any form.

This position requires bilingual skills, organizational skills, and an above-average amount of sanity (in order to compensate for my lack thereof).

Here's a brief summary of what your new job would entail...

1. Planning about 15 cost centers for the coming fiscal year in addition to carrying the normal end-of-the-month work load.

2. Multiple business meetings throughout the week.

3. Taking and making my phone calls (I'm very behind here).

4. Returning to ADAC in Duisburg to pick up my drivers license (yes, I've been driving without it for the past several weeks).

5. Writing thank-you notes.

6. Dealing with personal finances and bills.

7. Doing laundry, doing dishes, and cleaning.

If a secretary/PA could take care of these things, it'd free me up to actually be able to study and prepare for my driver's license tests. And play the piano. And finish the scarf I've been crocheting for months. And finish the book I've been reading for months. And maybe go to Greece or Uzbekistan. And not be so freaking stressed out 24/7.

I need my little chica here to tell me, "Eh, it'll all work out." Maybe in May.


Lyric of the day: "Someday you will find me caught beneath a landslide... in a champagne supernova in the sky..." (Thanks to Oasis)

Der Herr... El Senor... The Mister?

In both prayers and songs, Germans often refer to God as "Herr." Until recently, I'd only heard this word used in the context of "Herr So-and-So", meaning "Mr. So-and-So."

The same phenomena occurs among Spanish speakers, which I know thanks to my dear former roommate whose church I visited on several occasions. It's a purely Spanish-speaking church, and in prayers and songs, they frequently refer to God as the "Senor."

At first, I thought it was a Spanish-language thing, but being here in Germany raised some new questions. So, I decided to ask my brilliant friend Leo (my buddy Leo!) his opinion on the matter. He informed me that the word "Herr" has meanings above and beyond "Mister" or "Sir"... it can also mean "Lord", "Master", "Boss", or even "Gentleman." Ok. Makes semi-sense.

English speakers often refer to God as "Lord." "Master" is uncommon, but understandable. "Boss." Hmm... this'll make you think. And "Gentleman." I don't know if I'd refer to God as a "Gentleman." When I think "Gentleman", I think of someone standing on a doorstep, bowing slightly and revealing a bouquet of flowers. And maybe even wearing a light pink tie. Smooth and graceful... like Gene Kelly.

Anyway. Now we all know that there are multiple meanings for the word "Herr"... and we can assume that the same holds true for the Spanish word "Senor."

Now I'm curious about other languages... do French people, for example, refer to God as "Monsieur"...? Now that sounds suave and gentlemanly.


Lyric of the day: "Takes more than combat gear to make a man... takes more than a license for a gun. Confront your enemies, avoid them when you can... a gentleman will walk but never run." (Thanks to Sting)